DIY Laundry Detergent

For over a year now we've been making our own laundry detergent. With such a huge family the cost of detergent was eating huge chunks out of our monthly grocery budget. This recipe works great in both cold and hot water and does an excellent job of cleaning clothes well - even little boy clothes! It's super economical - only about $25 or less and lasts our family of 8 for six months. So if you've got a family smaller than that and don't have to do two loads of laundry a day, it'll last even longer!

I have found all of the supplies at WalMart in the laundry aisle. You'd likely be able to find them at your local grocery store or possibly even the hardware store. Once you've got your ingredients it only takes about a half hour to put together and then you're set!



LAUNDRY SOAP:

1 4lb 12oz box of Borax
1 4lb box Arm & Hammer Baking Soda
1 55oz box Arm & Hammer Super Washing Soda
3 bars of Fels-Naptha Soap
2 small containers of Oxy Clean (3 lbs each)
Optional: laundry crystals for scent (I don't use these)


Grate the bars of Fels-Naptha soap. I use my food processor for this and it works quickly and efficiently.



Combine all ingredients in a large bucket and mix well. I use my hands to mix it. It does take some arm strength. You could also use a large spoon.

Use one of the scoops that comes with the oxy clean (usually about 1-2 Tbs - depending on the size and soil amount in your laundry) per load.




Tip: I have eliminated dryer sheets and fabric softener by making my own wool dryer balls. Simply get some washed wool and use a felting tool to make a large ball. Two or three of these balls used together in the dryer will remove static, eliminate the need for fabric softener, and will noticeably cut your drying time.

A Room for the Lego Enthusiast

Little plastic bricks of varying shapes and sizes. Red, yellow, green, blue, gray, black, and white. Hair pieces, heads, weapons, legs, and head gear. Wheels and gears, windows and doors.

If you know what I'm talking about then you must have at least one lego enthusiast in your home. I have six, counting my husband and not yet counting our youngest child! Lego has exploded in my home. My children save money to buy lego, they ask for it for gifts, and a visit to a lego store is like stumbling upon the holy grail.



With so many lego enthusiasts, we decided to swap out our guest room for a lego room. About a year and a half ago we made the switch and I have never done a better thing for my sanity. For the most part, we let the kids go wild in there. They rarely clean it, and aside from our board games and a file cabinet, the room is completely devoted to lego. Lego is expected to stay in the lego room. No more vacuuming little pieces, no more death by lego for unsuspecting feet.

We began by putting a large table in our lego room (see pic above). It was our old kitchen table. We figured the kids would be able to use the surface for building and keep most lego off the floor. Wrong! Instead, they all fought over the space on the table. One would start a big project and then the others wouldn't have room for their buildings. We have now moved to a different solution.

We purchased six of these end tables from Ikea for $7.99 each.



To spruce them up a bit, I painted each child's initial on a table. That way we can avoid all the squabbles over who gets to build where. Each child now has their own place to build.



Originally, we had also put up a long shelf in the lego room. This was for those special projects that the kids just weren't ready to tear apart yet. Our kids are really into Harry Potter, Lord of the Rings, Star Wars, and The Hobbit. So naturally they have purchased many sets from those movies. Instead of building the sets once and then tearing them apart, we allow them to keep the sets on the shelf and bring them down for play. As they find they don't play with particular sets, they can pull them apart and place the pieces in a labeled ziploc bag. That way each kid knows which sets are theirs and they also keep all the pieces together. As adults they can either bring those lego sets to their own households or they can choose to sell them online. (We also keep the original boxes flattened in storage in case the kids want to sell the sets someday.) We found recently that one shelf was not quite enough, so we added a second.



Now, here's the part that really is up to individual preference. How do you store all the lego?? We used to keep our lego in a giant rolling toolbox. The special pieces went in the top compartments and the rest was in a big jumble. Our kids grew very frustrated wanting to find specific pieces but having to look through such a large mass of lego. In setting up our lego room, we decided to organize by type. We went to Menards and bought this wall system.



Originally we used double sided tape to place a piece of each type on the front of each container so the kids would know where things went. Those pieces have long since fallen off, but the kids still remember where the pieces belong. They have sorted them by size (1x4, 2x1, 4x4, etc) and by type (windows and doors, people, weapons, gears, etc.). It works well for us and is actually the way the professionals sort their lego.



We also have this little set of drawers to keep specialized parts in.



Lastly, we keep binders full of the directions that come with various sets. Without a specific place for these, we found that direction packets would often get trampled underfoot and end up ripped or crumpled. That just results in frustration for everyone!

We love the function of our lego room. And as a mom, I love the creativity that I see in my kids through what they build. If allowed, our kids would spend hours upon hours playing with lego. It has cut down on our kids' desire for video games and other less-healthy play. And it allows their imaginations to run wild.



Do you have specific ways to deal with the lego monster at your house? I'd love to hear about it!

Monthly Grocery Planning

We are a family of 8. We go through at least one gallon of milk a day, two loaves of bread every three days, and a bunch of bananas in one sitting. And we strive to live on a budget. We are a meat and potatoes kind of family. We enjoy all the food groups and don't partake in any fad diets. We simply eat healthy and in moderation. Even so, it's a lot of food!



Our oldest kids are entering the teen years and all six seem to grow non stop. I can't begin to count the number of times a day I hear the words, "I'm hungry". So, how do we keep our kids fed and not bust the budget? I can't give credit to couponing, because I really just don't take the time to do it. While I love the idea of coupons, I find that I end up buying unnecessary items just because I can get them cheap. In reality it doesn't really end up saving me money. Many people can do it well, but not me.

Instead of using coupons, we are careful list makers. We do our big grocery shopping once a month and aside from trips to the store for milk and produce, we agree to live on what we've purchased at the beginning of the month. I'll be honest, this takes a lot of planning and consideration. But you'll also find that it drastically cuts down on eating out and last minute runs to the store where buying just that one needed item is exchanged for a handful of things that look good.

So, to the nitty gritty details:

At the start of the month, I sit down with our family calendar and our meal calendar. Our meal calendar is just a regular 12 month calendar that hangs on our fridge. We write in each square what we plan to eat for dinner that evening. As I plan out our days, I keep our family calendar in front of me so that I can easily see what evenings may be rushed, when we have dinner with friends planned, when I may need to cook for a potluck or large event, etc. Now that our soccer season is starting back up, I am careful to plan crock pot meals on practice days so that my son can have a warm meal after his dinner-time practice. I know that Sundays are a time when my kids come home from church STARVING, so I either plan to have something cooking while we're at church or plan a meal that can be put together quickly once we arrive back home.



As a side note, I don't often plan out the sides for our meals unless it's a side I rarely make or if I'm hosting guests or planning a holiday feast. We keep lots of canned and frozen veggies and fruit on hand from our summer garden. I simply use these to supplement our meals.

Once my meal plan is complete, I begin a list of the basics we'll need. This usually means that I write down the various types of meats, noodles, canned goods, breads, etc. that we'll need and then count up how many of each I need for the meals planned that month. This is the most important stage of the process. Careful list making is necessary so that you are sure to have the ingredients on hand when you make meals throughout the month.



After I've made a list of the basics, my husband and I go through the freezer and pantry together. We take into account the things that we already have in on hand. Last month we found a great sale on chicken breasts so we purchased MANY and didn't have to buy any for this month's meals. If we find something during this process that needs to be used in the near future, I may adjust a meal on the calendar to fit it in. Better to adjust and use the things you already have than to waste the money and have it go bad.

We typically do our household goods shopping at the same time as our grocery shopping. So I also take the time to go through our bathrooms, kitchen, and storage areas to check on things like paper towels, detergent, toilet paper, napkins, dish soap, shampoo, etc. These things all come out of our grocery budget so it's important to plan for these items as well.

Aside from the actual shopping, the job is nearly done. I make one more neat list to take to the store. This one is laid out by department - produce, meat, dairy, frozen, etc. It makes it simpler to find the things I need in the store and to make sure they get crossed off my list. Especially if we are shopping at several stores in one day.

I know this leaves some questions unanswered. I'll do my best to answer the ones I can think of:

Where do you shop?
We shop in several places. We have a Sams membership and buy a lot of bulk items there. (Buying in bulk is definitely cost effective if you'll use the items in a timely way and can store it in your house.) We also like Aldi's. They actually have really good bread, yogurt, cheeses, and produce. I can't vouch for the meat, although I've heard some say that it's great. We just haven't tried it yet. We purchase our milk, oj, bananas, onions, and potatoes at Kwik Trip (gas station). They have milk and oj in a bag - which is so much cheaper and more convenient to store - and a rewards card so that you save quite a bit of money. We have our own chickens, so we never need to purchase eggs. We also buy several things at the Bent and Dent (Amish run store) nearby. If you have a Bent and Dent, check it out! I wouldn't recommend things like pasta or mixes that are not kept in a sealed plastic bag. However for cereal, medicines, canned goods, etc. it is an invaluable source! We can buy a large box of Cheerios there for $1.50 and a box of flavored oatmeal for $.75. That's a great deal!

How do you store all this stuff?
We've allotted a few shelves in our basement as grocery shelves. It's also where we keep our canned goods from the garden. One of our kids loves to organize, so he keeps it all sorted for us.

Isn't it a pain to be locked into your meal plan each day of the month?
I wouldn't say we're locked in. We do try to use the plan we have, but if I find we're not in the mood for something or if we need to change things around it's not a big deal. Once you've purchased what you need for the month, you just defrost or pull out what you need for any of the meals on the list. You only want to be careful that you're not stuck with tacos three times in the last week because you've switched things around so much.

How much do you spend?
The amount we spend varies each month. It really depends on how much we already have in store before the month begins (like with the chicken) and where we shop. Depending on where we purchase various items our bottom line looks different each month. (That may not be a satisfying answer, but the answer to this question will vary for each family. Just because one person can shop for a family of four on $60 per week doesn't mean every family of four can.)

How do you keep from overspending?
This is probably a whole blog post in and of itself! We use cash. At the beginning of the month we allot a specific amount to groceries. If we run out, then we make do with what we have. If we have extra it's exciting to put it towards our savings at the end of the month.

Would this work for a small family?
Absolutely! This kind of meal planning is great because you can tailor it to your family and your calendar. And it's great for a home with two working parents. It allows you to avoid the evening squabble over dinner plans and the financial strain of eating out frequently.


Happy planning! If you have tips on grocery shopping and meal planning, I'd love to hear them!

Advent Calendar

As our kids are getting older, we've enjoyed using an advent calendar through the month of December. For years we've talked of doing a Jesse tree, but can't seem to find the time to put it together. Last year we used a lego advent calendar and while it was fun for the kids, it didn't do anything to point us toward the real reason for celebrating Christmas.

This year I looked on pinterest for ideas and put a few different ideas together to come up with this:

I bought 12 pairs of baby mittens. You can look for Christmas themed ones, but I like that these are "wintery" instead of "Christmasy". I then took little tags and wrote the numbers 1-24 on one side and pinned them to the inside of the mitten.

On the other side of the tag is a list of Scriptures to read each day.

All of these mittens are hung with small (but not tiny) clothes pins. These can be found at craft stores like Michaels or Hobby Lobby. The rope is actual clothes line that we used on our clothes line outside. This is the leftover. It's sturdy enough to hold anything we put inside the mittens, but is green and pretty enough to work for Christmas decor.

Just before December first we'll also put a little treat inside each mitten so the kids can take turns looking inside. They'll receive a little gift (likely candy) and read the Scripture for the day. We plan to incorporate this into our normal morning devotions during breakfast.

What do I like about this?
1. It's reuseable. Each year we can pull it out and use it again and again.
2. The kids will have a fun thing to do to build anticipation as we move toward Christmas day.
3. It's doesn't end with the fun. We will read the Scripture verses and talk about what really matters.


Here are the verses we're using each day. These came recommended to us, but we haven't yet tried using them in this order for advent. We'll see how it goes. I've been thinking about using a second set of tags that has more of the prophecies from Isaiah and switching back and forth each year. But here's a starting place.

Day 1: Luke 2:21-40
Day 2: Matthew 1:1-25
Day 3: Luke 2:1-20
Day 4: Mark 9:33-37
Day 5: Matthew 4:12-17, Isaiah 9:1-3, Matthew 5:14-16
Day 6: Acts 20:35, I John 4:10
Day 7: Exodus 25
Day 8: Matthew 25:31-46
Day 9: Isaiah 9:6-7, Revelation 19:1-16, I Timothy 6:11-16
Day 10: Matthew 1:22-23, Isaiah 7:10-15, John 1:14
Day 11: Genesis 1:1-31, Isaiah 1:18, Psalm 51:1-10
Day 12: Revelation 2:1-5, I John 3:1-3
Day 13: Psalm 150
Day 14: Acts 15:22-31
Day 15: Luke 1, Jeremiah 32:17
Day 16: Matthew 2:1-12
Day 17: Galatians 4:1-7
Day 18: Isaiah 58, Matthew 6:16-18
Day 19: Luke 11:1-13
Day 20: John 1
Day 21: John 21:25
Day 22: Psalm 100
Day 23: Matthew 25
Day 24: John 3:16

Dining Room Reveal

When we moved here six and a half years ago, I began begging to tear out the carpet in the dining room. And last week it finally happened!

We arrived here on June 1st, 2006 with four children aged 5 and under. We were coming from a small apartment in St. Louis and were thrilled to finally have a place to spread out. When we arrived at 12am, we walked in the door and were surprised on many levels. Wonderfully surprised that the church had held a "pounding" and collected pantry supplies for us. Wonderfully surprised that someone had left a blow up mattress on the floor and bunk beds in one of the kids' bedrooms.

Horribly surprised that the moment we opened the front door all we could smell was cat pee. We knew the previous owners had a cat, but had no idea that the cat had peed in several places. The worst was on the carpet by the front door. Did I mention my husband is allergic to cats??

One of the very first things we did was to rip out the offensive section of carpet by the front door and install a cabinet - affectionately known as the CPC or Cat Pee Cover.

The monostrosity was wonderful for housing our fancy dishes and some larger kitchen items. But also became a collecting place for all mail and other junk that came in the front door. It also closed off the entryway and created a bottleneck every time we tried to leave the house or come home. Oh, the fights our children have had there!

Fast forward six years and one of my biggest to-do items was to get rid of the CPC! I was so sick of the arguments caused by such a small space for putting on shoes and coats. I was tired of cleaning it off only to have it covered with stuff a day later. Thankully, my husband is a genius and repurposed the CPC into a lovely shoe shelf with room for the many sneakers, cleats, boots and sandals we seem to acquire.

Once the CPC was gone, we didn't have a choice but to address the flooring issue. But first we decided to paint while the old carpet was still in place. It's also important to know that the dining room is where we do the majority of our homeschooling. I had originally painted the dining room a beautiful, rich red. Did you know that red in the dining area is supposed to help with digestion? Apparently, it does not help with concentration. The room has poor lighting and only gets the early morning sun. So with dark walls and now dark carpet (thanks to all the spots), my kids felt sleepy instead of energized to work hard.

Now we have a beautiful, bright, cheerful room for working and eating. And my dishes still match! We added the chair rail to dress it up a bit and changed all the trim to white. I love it.

Next to address the carpet. Who in their right mind puts cream colored carpet in a dining room?! It wasn't pretty when we arrived, but after six years of abuse from our kids it was hideous. It had turned into a catalog of our food mishaps ... smooshed oreo over here, spaghetti over there, and a mashed fruit snack stuck in the threads center stage. Gross.

(When we tore out the kitchen flooring we found a lovely spot that was all rotted near the sliding doors. Josh had the delightful job of ripping out the rot and installing new subflooring in that area. Did I mention he's handy to have around?)

We finished just in time to have the floor guys come and install our Pergo wood floors. Oh happy day! Look at how beautiful this is.

The gorgeous quilt on the wall is an heirloom piece begun by my great aunt, and passed on to me by my aunt. It was quilted by a friend from our church and is such a treasure to have. I couldn't bear to keep it hidden away in a chest or to put it on a bed and have it destroyed by munchkins. The wall seems the perfect place for it until the kids are older.

The room feels huge and I find that I love to be in it. There are still a few projects left to do: I have a deacons bench that will go on the empty wall across from the front door (where Jesse's booster seat is in the picture). And we haven't yet decided which framed artwork will hang above it. The deacons bench will provide a great place for us to sit while putting on shoes and will house our diaper bag and camera bag inside the bench.

I also need curtains for the window. We used to have lace curtains, but that's much too old lady for this room. Instead, my mother-in-law has offered to help me make some curtains next week. I can't wait to fabric shop and see what we find.

I'm just so pleased with the results of this room. It is well worth the wait. And now, I won't feel sick to my stomach when I see my little Micah crawling on the dining room floor in a few months.

Oh, and did I mention we also did the kitchen floor? Love that too! And the new kitchen rug by the sink just makes me smile. Yay for renovations!

Teen Expectations

Linking up with the MOB (Mothers of Boys) Society today.


Earlier today I posted the following article onto my facebook page. It was mainly in response to a couple of friends who were struggling with their teens and some rebellion issues. However, if you've been on facebook for long, you've likely seen this floating around. Take a moment and read it.

I wasn't expecting to receive any responses from it - let alone the passionate remarks it stirred. And given that I have some strong thoughts on teens in our society, I figured I'd write my response here instead of in several long comments on my facebook status.

I may have young children, but I also have two boys on the cusp of being teens. In fact, I do consider my 12 and a half year old a teen because of his maturity level. Because of this, I've been giving much thought over the last year to how I should approach the teen years with my children. I don't want to settle for the status quo of backtalk, rebellion, and stupid decisions. I'm not naive - I do know some of that will occur, but I certainly hope it will not be the norm for my children.

To that end, I've had my oldest read a book entitled "Do Hard Things" by Brett and Alex Harris. It's an excellent call for teens to go beyond the low expectations of society and meet their potential. I blogged a bit about it here if you are interested. The basic premise is that around the world and throughout history, teens have been expected to do ... something. They aren't just children still living at home. They aren't yet adults. But they are adults in training who no longer want to be considered children. And their capabilities are amazing!

As parents it's our responsibility to give our children wings as they approach adulthood. You give them the opportunity to make choices, to fail or soar, to feel the consequences of their actions (good or bad) within the safety of your home and care. You guide with tough love, much grace, and unending forgiveness. And most importantly, you must model with your own life the type of adult you hope your child will become.

In almost all other societies, teens are considered productive members of society. They are expected to contribute, to add to the community and to the family. They are not permitted to live in fantasy or seek out "fun" unless the work is done. And work isn't just homework. It may be chores at home or on the farm, it may be a steady job. It may be hard and it may be inconvenient and it may be dirty. But teens are capable, strong, and smart. They can do much more than we in America give them credit for!

My problem with our society is that I see so many young twenty somethings living in their parents' basement, playing video games, and avoiding the job market. I'm not talking about honest, hardworking young adults who just need a boost to get on their feet. I'm talking about the MANY who are avoiding adulthood in favor of continuing a childhood that has stretched much too far. This isn't some nebulus group of people "out there". I've met them. They're in our town, they are people I care for.

So what to do? Is it right to just yell at kids and say "Do more. Get a job. Do chores. Read books." No, that won't do it. It falls to the parents. WE are the ones who must teach responsibility to our children. WE are the ones who must push our children to their potential while also providing a safe place to fail. WE must encourage, cheer, and reward successes.

Before writing this, I shared the article with my two oldest boys at the dinner table. I told them nothing of what I was about to read except that I wanted their opinions. I stressed that I'd be fine with them having differing opinions of each other and of the article. I read it, and I waited.

Both said they thought the article was right on. One said he felt it was a little harsh in the wording but that he agreed with the premise. I asked them to explain their thought process in agreeing - still not having voiced my opinion - and they shared that they know they are capable of much more than what is typically required of kids. They feel they can be important and productive. They want to have responsibility.

I didn't have to ask my next question, because I already knew the answer. They also want to be kids. And therein is the conundrum of teens. Part kid, part adult. They need time to play, to be silly, to hang out with friends, to get some extra sleep as they grow. But when we let that be the entirety of teen life, we're actually doing our children harm, not good. How is that preparing them for adulthood? How does silliness ready them for a job or marriage? How does expecting them to cop an attitude contribute to their well-being?

We tell our kids when they talk back to us that it's unacceptable. And we tell them why. Not only are they to respect their parents under God's laws, but under man's laws, they can be fired from a job for sassing their boss. If you are rude to those you meet, you'll soon be a lonely human being. You'll quickly burn bridges and you'll lose the respect of those around you.

It's the same when we give our children chores and responsibilities. My children have school year round. They also have chores year round. They are required to help in the garden in summer. They vacuum, clean bathrooms, do dishes, wash laundry, and help with their younger siblings. Am I stealing their childhood? I don't believe I am. I do expect a lot from my children, but I don't expect more than they can do. I would never ask a 4 year old to get out the big vacuum and clean the floors. The vacuum is as big as he is! It would be an unrealistic and frustrating expectation. Instead, I ask my 4 year old to make sure he puts two rolls of toilet paper on each toilet in the house so that we don't have issues of running out while someone is on the pot. He has the satisfaction of contributing to the household in an age appropriate way.

It's the same with our teens. I wouldn't normally ask my oldest to simply put toilet paper on the toilets because he is capable of so much more. Instead, he is the one cleaning the toilets. He is the one vacuuming. He's capable, he feels good when he has accomplished the task. And here's the kicker. When he's done with work, he's free to play. It's not an exclusive issue. Teens need the play and the responsibility. But the play should come AFTER the responsibility, not before. And that's where much of our society has it backwards. Many want their kids to have all the fun they can and if there's time left over they can help out. Because of this, we're raising lazy adults who feel entitled to an easy lifestyle and are going into massive amounts of debt to acheive that lifestyle.

All this to say: Love your kids. Love them enough to help them reach their potential - in all areas of life. Take a good look at their capabilities and give them the respect they long for by recognizing how mature they can be if given the chance. And when they fail, which they will, be there to help them back up, encourage them onward, and celebrate when they succeed the next time around.

A Boring Past

Today I was washing the dishes. Thankfully that's becoming a less frequent chore for me because of the many little minions I have in the house. Let me tell you, mothers of young children, there really is a time coming where your kids will handle many of the household chores. Oh blessed day! For example, just today my kids cleaned all four bathrooms, vacuumed the main level of the house, folded laundry, and picked up. You'd think I'd be a lady of leisure by now, but alas, there is always still much more to do than I have hours in my day.

Anyway, I was washing the dishes. Honestly, I was a bit grumbly in my heart. I knew that I was just washing the dishes in order to dirty them again by making a delicious dinner for the family. And it was me washing them because I wanted my kids to enjoy the gorgeous weather outside instead of being stuck inside just before winter.

As I washed and grumbled in my heart, my oldest - who was icing a jammed finger - made a comment that stopped me in my tracks. He said, "People sure must have been bored in the olden days."

What?

I asked him to repeat the statement to be sure that I had heard correctly and then asked him to explain his thinking on that ridiculous statement. He simply replied that he figured they just had a lot less to do back then.

Oh, my poor misguided child!

I quickly launched into a long diatribe describing how much more work they had. They didn't have electric or gas stoves. They had to chop their own wood to heat their houses. Showering wasn't done quickly and with ease most nights of the week. There were no dishwashers, no garbage disposals, no plastic diapers. Farming was much more difficult without the modern machinery we now have. Cleaning was a constant job. On and on and on.

Finally he interrupted and said, "Well, at least the kids were probably bored."

Again, what?

As I began on another diatribe about how much was required of children and at such an early age, he quickly stood, stated his finger was better and ran outside to play. I guess I made my point. He probably saw the inevitable direction of my lecture, which would lead to more work for him. He knows me well. Hint at boredom in our house and you are given a chore to fill your time.

At least I set this one child straight. But it sure got me to thinking. So often we complain about the state of things today. We spend a ridiculous amount of money on conveniences and then complain about our lack of time and money. Frankly, in reviewing the difficult life our ancestors had, I really don't long to live in a different time. Politically, yes. Religiously, you bet. But in regards to the advances of science, medicine, and technology I'm quite happy to be living in this era. Aren't you?

And you can bet that the next time I'm complaining in my heart about doing the dishes, I'll remember this little chat with my son and thank God for His goodness in providing running water, a dishwasher, and so many other things. I really do have NOTHING to complain about.

Earn your keep and keep what you earn

I read an article in this week's World Magazine that has me thinking. In fact, it's something that Josh and I have been talking about for some time. The basic premise of the article is that the need for college training seems to be waning while the demand for those with technical skills is increasing.

The article cites Mike Rowe's words as he testified before the U.S. Senate in 2011. Rowe states that while there is a high unemployment rate in the U.S., there is actually a tremendous need for people with trade skills. There just aren't enough people skilled in specific trades.

Josh and I have heard this idea mentioned by several people and have read about it in a variety of publications over the last several months. I'm sure it's something we'll continue to discuss as our own children speed toward the time when they will need to make decisions about their future careers.

However, regardless of whether our children decide to head the route of learning a trade or studying in college, there are some things that I'm convinced we need to teach our children if they will succeed in life.

The first thing they must learn is a good work ethic. There's a great little book called The Fred Factor. It's about a postman named Fred. Fred is an excellent worker. He is conscientious, goes above and beyond the call of duty, and cares for those he serves. Fred is a good example of how I want my children to behave in whatever God calls them to do.

Teaching diligence and perseverance starts at home. Teaching my children to tackle even the tough jobs begins with cleaning up toys, washing dishes, and watering the garden. Our oldest recently read the book "Do Hard Things" by Brett and Alex Harris. He loved it! The Harris twins challenge teens to go beyond the expectations of society. It's only in recent times that teens have been given a wild card to act out, be disrespectful, and continue their childhood. Throughout history, teens have held incredible responsiblity - some doing work that we wouldn't even expect a 30 year old to tackle nowadays!

So, in mutual agreement, Josh and I have decided that we will be counter-cultural in raising our children to be productive, respectable, honest members of society. Even as teens. But especially as adults. None of this "28 year old man-child living in the basement playing video games and avoiding the job market" stuff for our kids!

The second thing we have decided is of utmost importance to our children's future success is to teach them how to handle money. How many people do you know with absolutley no debt? Not even a mortgage? I know of maybe a handful. Now, I'm not totally against a mortgage, but I do feel that if it can be avoided, it should be.

When Josh and I first got married, we had the attitude that we were entitled to have everything our parents had. We began our marriage by filling our house with all the "necessary" items of life. Right down to a coat rack. As if a coat closet wasn't enough. If we didn't have it and we "needed" it, we bought it. Hang the cost!

It has taken us over a decade to change those habits - and especially to change our way of thinking. For the Christian, the attitude of instant gratification leaves no room for God to provide. It keeps us from bringing our needs to the One who loves to provide in remarkable ways and to receive the glory for it. It also negates the role of the church in providing for one another. How wonderful when a brother in Christ can fix your lawnmower and later you can serve him by tending his garden. We each have different skills and gifts. But when we rely only on ourselves, we neglect to utilize and recognize the remarkable gifts God has given to others.

In terms of spending, we've had some hard lessons to learn. We've been "in plenty" and "in want" in our almost 13 years of marriage. We had three lean years during seminary when we sometimes wondered how we'd pay for groceries or clothe our children. But God always provided and often in extraordinary ways! Now that we have a regular income we have to carefully keep ourselves from foolish spending. We recently switched to using cash only. If the money isn't there, we can't buy it. Our savings and our tithe come out of the paycheck first and the remainder is for us to wisely use for living. Would you believe, we're saving more now than ever before?! The absence of credit card spending has caused us to more carefully evaluate our purchases and to be sure it's something we need before just rushing out to fulfill our wants.

These are things I want my children to learn. A good worker, diligent and trustworthy will be sought after in the workforce. Someone who is mindful of his spending and who has adopted good money habits will have far fewer worries than his contemporaries.

Regardless of what my children choose to do in life, I hope they will regard their work in this way:

"No work is insignificant. All labor that uplifts humanity has dignity and importance and should be
undertaken with painstaking excellence.” - Martin Luther King, Jr.

And their wealth in this way:

Proverbs 28:6 Better is a poor man who walks in his integrity than a rich man who is crooked in his ways.
Proverbs 23:4 Do not wear yourself out to get rich; have the wisdom to show restraint.

A Cup of Patience and a Dash of Grace

I began homeschooling three years ago with grandiose visions of teaching my children all they would need to know about practical things like cooking, cleaning, laundry, and repairs. And of course they would also be advanced in all subjects, speaking several languages, and reading a book a week.

Okay, okay. Maybe my dreams weren't really quite that big, but I definitely expected to fit more in than real life normally allows.

One of those dreams was to teach my children how to cook. I figured that since my kids would be home all day, I'd just give each one a week of the month and they would cook for that whole week with me.

But I forgot something.

I don't like to cook with kids. Ever.

I'm not one of those moms that overlooks sticky floors, messy counters, licked spoons dropped back into the batter, and inedible results after hours in the kitchen. I typically find cooking with my children to be exhausting, frustrating, and an overall headache-producing endeavor.

This year, however, I am braving the kitchen with ONE of my children. I have decided that 5th grade will include a unit on cooking. Whichever season does not include a sport for the 5th grader will be the time they tackle this intensive unit. For David, my current 5th grader, that means now.

We started two days ago. And amazingly, it's going really well! There's something to say for a child who can use a knife without supervision, listen to instruction and actually do what they're told, read a recipe, keep the mess to a minimum, and have the good sense not to burn themself on the stove.

So far we've made stir fry and potato soup. On the menu for later this week are beef stew, chicken and rice casserole, spaghetti and other yummy meals.

I love that I am enjoying cooking with my son. It reminds me of when Josh and I first married and would cook a meal together - except that David doesn't use every single pot in the kitchen.

My goal is to have David cook an entire week of meals on his own by the end of this unit. Meaning that he'll have to plan the menu, make the shopping list, shop with me and pay at the register, and then cook all the meals.

He swears he'll never get married, so I have convinced him of the importance of this by appealing to his stomach. I mean, really, what man wants to eat microwave meals every night when he finally leaves the nest?

So, here I go! Wish me luck. And pray that I have patience in the kitchen for the next three months. Because after this kid, I have four more to go.

Still learning

Do you ever have those moments when you suddenly realize that you've missed out on something for YEARS that would have made life so much easier? One of those, "Oh, duh!" moments when your palm makes contact with your forehead?

I just had (another) one of those.

Even after four children, I have never thought of a way to keep the mess from the booster seat off the chair. We came pretty close to ruining some of our nice dining room chairs during the toddler years and have designated one wooden kitchen chair as "THE booster seat chair". In fact, the booster seat just stays on there so we don't have to risk sitting on something gross. Even though Gabe has been out of the booster for at least two years.

But just a few moments ago, I saw a picture of a booster seat with a towel between the bottom of the booster and the seat of the chair. Really??? It can be that simple? Good grief!

So now, in a few months, when Jesse begins eating solids, you better believe that we'll be putting a towel under our booster. And clean up will be a cinch!

Ahhh ... life with kids just got a little better.

Pack Rats, Hoarders ... and Joy?

The other day I needed some time to veg out. It had been a long day and my brain needed some time away from the reality of kids, housecleaning, pregnancy and to-do lists.

I checked out Netflix and decided to watch an episode of Hoarders. I admit it, I wanted something that was going to make me feel good. I've been working to declutter and organize my home lately and although I wouldn't have admitted it at the time, deep down I was hoping to gather some "Ha! My house doesn't look like that!" kind of good feelings from the show.



All began well. Until I heard people say over and over again that they were called "pack rats" as children and that many hoarders grow up in homes with organized parents. I started to freak out a little bit as I thought back to the day before when I had spent two hours cleaning out my boys' room. And then I freaked out a little more as I realized just how often we call a couple of our children "pack rats". What if my children grow up to become hoarders??!!! What can I possibly do to prevent such a difficult road for them?

I ended the show second guessing my parenting skills. Certainly not the feel good fuzzies I'd been hoping for.

And now I've spent two days contemplating the show, my life and the lives of my children.

But I'm more encouraged now. Because I have realized several very important things. First, I am not a hoarder. Although my house is often a mess and we certainly have more than we need, in reflection I can see that I've made a deliberate decision to spend time with my children rather than focus on a perfect house.

Second, although hoarding is definitely often tied to psychological issues, there was something that stood out in each hoarder's comments. Their joy is in their stuff.

Several times I heard the hoarders or their spouses confess that they derived great joy from shopping for these items. Others found joy in the actual stuff - sometimes because of the memories attached to the items and sometimes because it gave them a sense of worth or self-confidence.

Why do I find these things to be so encouraging? Because it means that there is hope for my pack rat children. It means that I have the opportunity to teach them to find their joy in a source that will not destroy them. What source is that? The one true Source of joy: Jesus Christ!

As I was looking up verses in the Bible about joy, I found this one:
"For to the one who pleases him God has given wisdom and knowledge and joy, but to the sinner he has given the business of gathering and collecting." Ecclesiastes 2:26
Hmmm. Interesting.

There are many verses that talk about joy. There are a few that I really like.

You make known to me the path of life; in your presence there is fullness of joy; at your right hand are pleasures forevermore. Psalm 16:11

Speaking of the righteous: Instead of your shame there shall be a double portion; instead of dishonor they shall rejoice in their lot; therefore in their land they shall possess a double portion; they shall have everlasting joy. Isaiah 61:7 (I found this one particularly appropriate given that with hoarding also comes a deep sense of shame because of the messy and sometimes unsanitary conditions. And so many hoarders have 2, 3, or 10 of the same item simply so that they can have whatever they need on hand at any given time. They collect to provide for themselves, but God will provide a double portion for the righteous - a portion we don't have to buy!)

May the God of hope fill you with all joy and peace as you trust in him, so that you may overflow with hope by the power of the Holy Spirit. Romans 15:13

But the fruit of the Spirit is love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness and self-control. Galatians 5:22-23

I have no greater joy than to hear that my children are walking in the truth. 3 John 1:4

That last one is the kicker. I want my children to walk in God's ways - which the Bible says again and again is the source of our joy.

If I'm to understand Scripture correctly, I can protect my children from hoarding and so many other destructive behaviors by teaching them the truth found in God's Word. If I consistently model trust in God's provision - and draw their attention to the many ways He provides - they will be much more likely to place their trust in Jehovah Jireh once they leave the nest.

I have no desire to come down hard on those who are hoarding. I'm not trying to point my finger and say, "Shame on you!" But for the grace of God, that would be me! Instead, I'm thankful for the opportunity to reevaluate what I'm teaching my children. Stuff is simply that ... stuff. You can't take it with you when you die. But joy in the Lord? That can last eternity!

Where do you place your joy?

Newspapers to Riches

Surely several of you out there in bloggy land have desks that are unused. Unused not because of their placement or impractical nature, but because they look like this:



Yeah, me too.

By now, you probably think I'm the messiest person alive. But honestly, most of the areas I'm showing you are either closed off (like the inside of my desk) or not as noticeable - which would be why they don't get cleaned as frequently. Well, except for the big project that I'm gathering strength for. That's very visible and is one of the areas I hate most in our house. But that's another day.

Today my big project was to declutter my desk. Actually my project started out with just trying to clean off the TOP of the desk since it looked so hideous.



But really it went so quickly that I felt invigorated and decided to shoot for bigger goals. And now my desk looks like this:



BIG difference! And it's not just the visible parts. I organized all the drawers too. I know ... I'm such an overachiever. (Yeah, right.)

You may wonder what all that clutter was about and what in the world I did with it all. Well aside from a slew of pictures, I have actually sorted through everything and put it away. Imagine that!

Mostly I had a bunch of papers that were ready to be recycled. Things like catalogs I had set there hoping to keep gift ideas close at hand, newspapers that housed articles by Josh or pictures of my kids to cut out, and of course a bunch of random papers that really didn't need to be clogging up my desk.

Oh and $70 in cash! That was nice to find! And it certainly made my hubby pretty excited about my desk cleaning adventure. I guess you never know what you'll find hiding amidst the chaos.

So what are you waiting for ... go clean something! You might get rich doing it.

Operation Declutter: Fridge Top

I'm sure many of you already think I'm nuts. But despite my normal craziness and the chaos of everyday life, I'm just not able to control my organizational and nesting urges!

There's a blog I follow and the author is doing a 31 day challenge to re-decorate her house. I've been reading for awhile now and I can't help but be inspired by the seemingly easy changes she's making. Now, I don't really want to go to the trouble of buying and selling furniture on Craigs List, or redecorating my house. But I WOULD like to declutter my house before the baby arrives.

I'm not delusional enough to think that I can accomplish a decluttering task each day for a month. However given that I have 13 weeks or so before this little guy arrives, I should be able to get several things done. Besides that, my mom has happily stated that she would like to host a garage sale this summer which would give me a great outlet for ridding our house of unwanted junk!

So after much thought and some list making, I decided to tackle my first project yesterday (and part of today).

I knew we had several things going on, so I had hoped to find a short and easy task to boost my confidence in this new venture. I decided to attack the top of our fridge and the cabinet that housed our many, many vases.

Now, you may think that task unworthy. But ... I am ashamed to admit our fridge top looked like this:





And because the front of our fridge looks like this, just about everyone who comes to our house stops at the fridge for several minutes.



And if those guests are any taller than me, they can see the horrid dust and grime that sits atop our fridge.

Now the top of the fridge was pretty simple to clean. Soft scrub, gloves and paper towels make any cleaning job easy.

But remember, I wasn't just tackling the top of the fridge. I also wanted to declutter the cabinet above the fridge. Yup, the one that was filled to the brim with vases to the point that they overflowed onto my countertops.



Simple enough, right? Riiight. As I pulled out vases, I realized that several had the crud inside that comes from icky flower water leaving a film all over the inside of the vase. I'd heard that you should wash that with bleach, so I figured I'd clean the inside of ALL the vases. Smart, Ali.

I bleached every single vase - which by the way does work very, very well. Then, I sorted the vases and decided which ones to keep. I mean, really, how many flowers do I typically have in my house at one time?? So, I kept one of each size of vase (to accommodate different sizes and types of flowers, of course) and boxed up the rest for that garage sale I mentioned.

Oh, and since I'm at the task of decluttering, I just had to stop at a garage sale yesterday that had tons of tupperware and other containers. Makes sense right? Yeah. While I did get a few items to help with some of my decluttering tasks, I also got a few larger tupperware items for the kitchen. Things that I don't have space for, but that I've been wanting for a long time. Like a salad spinner, a cupcake holder and a cake carrier. Seriously, I cringe every time I'm making a salad and have to bruise the leaves to get the water off of them. Really, I do.

So, with this newly cleared space only half filled with vases, I was able to fit my new tupperware items. Yay me! And my fridge is no longer an embarrassment! Well, unless you open it. But that's a project for another day.

Here's a pic of the clean and organized finished product.



I know it's not the biggest accomplishment in the world, but it's a start. And starting is half the battle.