How To Can Peaches

Summertime is the time for peaches! And if you are like many of the people in my family, you wish you could enjoy their fresh taste all year. Canning peaches is incredibly easy and allows you to get that delicious Georgia peach taste even in the dead of winter.

We typically buy a 25lb box of peaches (half a bushel) and get about 13 quarts of peaches out of it. Not a lot, but still enough for at least one jar a month.

To begin, make sure your peaches are soft, but not overripe. If the peaches are too tough, they'll be difficult to peel. If too soft, you'll run into the same problem. And instead of leaving them in the box to ripen, spread them out on a table. This will separate any that have small bruises from the rest of the bunch and will keep the good peaches from rotting.

Once your peaches are ready, simply peel the skins from the outside of your peaches. I typically use a sharp, small knife for this job. If the skins don't come off easily, you can dip the peaches in boiling water for 10-30 seconds and then immediately submerge them in ice water. The point is not to cook the peaches, but to loosen the skin.

After peeling your peaches, slice them in half and take out the pit. The easiest way to get the pit out is with a spoon. Gently loosen around the pit and it'll pop right out.



Place your peach halves pit side down in WIDE mouth jars. Using wide mouths allows you to fit peach halves in your jars. You may think that cutting the peaches into smaller slices will allow you to fit more, but after experimentation, we've found that you can fit the same amount whether you use quarters or halves.



Fill the jar with your peach halves.



Make a syrup of sugar and water. You'll want 1 cup sugar to every 3 cups water. It takes about a cup and half to fill each jar, so make plenty of this. Place the sugar and water in a saucepan and heat until the sugar is melted. Do not boil this as you don't want your good syrup to boil down.

Pour the syrup into the jars over the peaches leaving 1/2" of headspace. Remove bubbles and place the lid and ring on the jar.



Process the jars at 5lb pressure for 10 minutes and then allow to cool completely.


Note: For reasons I can't explain, some jars do lose liquid during the pressure canning stage. These jars are still fine to store so long as the seal is good. If you store the jars for several years, you may find some browning on the top peaches. Just remove those peaches and eat the ones underneath. But really, these peaches aren't going to last several years! You'll have eaten them long before that!!

DIY Laundry Detergent

For over a year now we've been making our own laundry detergent. With such a huge family the cost of detergent was eating huge chunks out of our monthly grocery budget. This recipe works great in both cold and hot water and does an excellent job of cleaning clothes well - even little boy clothes! It's super economical - only about $25 or less and lasts our family of 8 for six months. So if you've got a family smaller than that and don't have to do two loads of laundry a day, it'll last even longer!

I have found all of the supplies at WalMart in the laundry aisle. You'd likely be able to find them at your local grocery store or possibly even the hardware store. Once you've got your ingredients it only takes about a half hour to put together and then you're set!



LAUNDRY SOAP:

1 4lb 12oz box of Borax
1 4lb box Arm & Hammer Baking Soda
1 55oz box Arm & Hammer Super Washing Soda
3 bars of Fels-Naptha Soap
2 small containers of Oxy Clean (3 lbs each)
Optional: laundry crystals for scent (I don't use these)


Grate the bars of Fels-Naptha soap. I use my food processor for this and it works quickly and efficiently.



Combine all ingredients in a large bucket and mix well. I use my hands to mix it. It does take some arm strength. You could also use a large spoon.

Use one of the scoops that comes with the oxy clean (usually about 1-2 Tbs - depending on the size and soil amount in your laundry) per load.




Tip: I have eliminated dryer sheets and fabric softener by making my own wool dryer balls. Simply get some washed wool and use a felting tool to make a large ball. Two or three of these balls used together in the dryer will remove static, eliminate the need for fabric softener, and will noticeably cut your drying time.

Ordinary Grows Beauty

I recently watched this video promoting Francis and Lisa Chan's book "You and Me Forever".



The video features our friends, Mike and Sharon, who, after having three children went on to adopt nine more. Their children are growing up and some have reached adulthood and are doing amazing things for the Kingdom of God. It's easy to look at their family and think that their life must be charmed. But I know they have faced plenty of hardships and difficulties. Sharon says it in her own words in the video and this particular quote stuck with me long after the video stopped playing.

"Serving God takes a lot of submission and a lot of repetitious, unglamorous work. I think people can look at our family and see 12 vivacious kids and think, 'Wow! What a beautiful thing!' But that involved years and years of doing the same thing over and over again. You have to be willing to make yourself nothing sometimes and then He blesses those efforts in the end and makes it into something beautiful."

I love this quote because it so well describes what life really is. Behind every person doing great things for the Lord is a lot of day in and day out faithfulness. It takes me straight to the verse I have adopted as my motto for these years with children at home. "Do not despise these small beginnings, for the Lord rejoices to see the work begin." (Zechariah 4:10) And this, "Everyone to whom much was given, of him much will be required, and from him to whom they entrusted much, they will demand the more." (Luke 12:48)

Probably very few of those reading this will have 12 kids like the Dennehy clan. And none of us will have identical lives to each other. But each of us has been given much with which to be faithful. Perhaps it's your work, your family, your possessions, your ministry, your friends. We all have small beginnings in our lives; areas in which we are called to work faithfully. Things that require day in and day out, over and over again actions. Things that can seem monotonous, dull, and frustrating in the moment.

Whether or not you look closely enough at someone's life to see the mundane, it is there. I know it is present in my life. The question then is not, "Will I have to do the mundane, ordinary things to serve God?" The question is, "How can I be faithful in doing the mundane and ordinary?"

The answer? Keep on. Do the next thing and practice thankfulness. Remember your blessings and from whom they come. Be faithful even in these little things and God will make something beautiful out of the ordinary.

Monthly Grocery Planning

We are a family of 8. We go through at least one gallon of milk a day, two loaves of bread every three days, and a bunch of bananas in one sitting. And we strive to live on a budget. We are a meat and potatoes kind of family. We enjoy all the food groups and don't partake in any fad diets. We simply eat healthy and in moderation. Even so, it's a lot of food!



Our oldest kids are entering the teen years and all six seem to grow non stop. I can't begin to count the number of times a day I hear the words, "I'm hungry". So, how do we keep our kids fed and not bust the budget? I can't give credit to couponing, because I really just don't take the time to do it. While I love the idea of coupons, I find that I end up buying unnecessary items just because I can get them cheap. In reality it doesn't really end up saving me money. Many people can do it well, but not me.

Instead of using coupons, we are careful list makers. We do our big grocery shopping once a month and aside from trips to the store for milk and produce, we agree to live on what we've purchased at the beginning of the month. I'll be honest, this takes a lot of planning and consideration. But you'll also find that it drastically cuts down on eating out and last minute runs to the store where buying just that one needed item is exchanged for a handful of things that look good.

So, to the nitty gritty details:

At the start of the month, I sit down with our family calendar and our meal calendar. Our meal calendar is just a regular 12 month calendar that hangs on our fridge. We write in each square what we plan to eat for dinner that evening. As I plan out our days, I keep our family calendar in front of me so that I can easily see what evenings may be rushed, when we have dinner with friends planned, when I may need to cook for a potluck or large event, etc. Now that our soccer season is starting back up, I am careful to plan crock pot meals on practice days so that my son can have a warm meal after his dinner-time practice. I know that Sundays are a time when my kids come home from church STARVING, so I either plan to have something cooking while we're at church or plan a meal that can be put together quickly once we arrive back home.



As a side note, I don't often plan out the sides for our meals unless it's a side I rarely make or if I'm hosting guests or planning a holiday feast. We keep lots of canned and frozen veggies and fruit on hand from our summer garden. I simply use these to supplement our meals.

Once my meal plan is complete, I begin a list of the basics we'll need. This usually means that I write down the various types of meats, noodles, canned goods, breads, etc. that we'll need and then count up how many of each I need for the meals planned that month. This is the most important stage of the process. Careful list making is necessary so that you are sure to have the ingredients on hand when you make meals throughout the month.



After I've made a list of the basics, my husband and I go through the freezer and pantry together. We take into account the things that we already have in on hand. Last month we found a great sale on chicken breasts so we purchased MANY and didn't have to buy any for this month's meals. If we find something during this process that needs to be used in the near future, I may adjust a meal on the calendar to fit it in. Better to adjust and use the things you already have than to waste the money and have it go bad.

We typically do our household goods shopping at the same time as our grocery shopping. So I also take the time to go through our bathrooms, kitchen, and storage areas to check on things like paper towels, detergent, toilet paper, napkins, dish soap, shampoo, etc. These things all come out of our grocery budget so it's important to plan for these items as well.

Aside from the actual shopping, the job is nearly done. I make one more neat list to take to the store. This one is laid out by department - produce, meat, dairy, frozen, etc. It makes it simpler to find the things I need in the store and to make sure they get crossed off my list. Especially if we are shopping at several stores in one day.

I know this leaves some questions unanswered. I'll do my best to answer the ones I can think of:

Where do you shop?
We shop in several places. We have a Sams membership and buy a lot of bulk items there. (Buying in bulk is definitely cost effective if you'll use the items in a timely way and can store it in your house.) We also like Aldi's. They actually have really good bread, yogurt, cheeses, and produce. I can't vouch for the meat, although I've heard some say that it's great. We just haven't tried it yet. We purchase our milk, oj, bananas, onions, and potatoes at Kwik Trip (gas station). They have milk and oj in a bag - which is so much cheaper and more convenient to store - and a rewards card so that you save quite a bit of money. We have our own chickens, so we never need to purchase eggs. We also buy several things at the Bent and Dent (Amish run store) nearby. If you have a Bent and Dent, check it out! I wouldn't recommend things like pasta or mixes that are not kept in a sealed plastic bag. However for cereal, medicines, canned goods, etc. it is an invaluable source! We can buy a large box of Cheerios there for $1.50 and a box of flavored oatmeal for $.75. That's a great deal!

How do you store all this stuff?
We've allotted a few shelves in our basement as grocery shelves. It's also where we keep our canned goods from the garden. One of our kids loves to organize, so he keeps it all sorted for us.

Isn't it a pain to be locked into your meal plan each day of the month?
I wouldn't say we're locked in. We do try to use the plan we have, but if I find we're not in the mood for something or if we need to change things around it's not a big deal. Once you've purchased what you need for the month, you just defrost or pull out what you need for any of the meals on the list. You only want to be careful that you're not stuck with tacos three times in the last week because you've switched things around so much.

How much do you spend?
The amount we spend varies each month. It really depends on how much we already have in store before the month begins (like with the chicken) and where we shop. Depending on where we purchase various items our bottom line looks different each month. (That may not be a satisfying answer, but the answer to this question will vary for each family. Just because one person can shop for a family of four on $60 per week doesn't mean every family of four can.)

How do you keep from overspending?
This is probably a whole blog post in and of itself! We use cash. At the beginning of the month we allot a specific amount to groceries. If we run out, then we make do with what we have. If we have extra it's exciting to put it towards our savings at the end of the month.

Would this work for a small family?
Absolutely! This kind of meal planning is great because you can tailor it to your family and your calendar. And it's great for a home with two working parents. It allows you to avoid the evening squabble over dinner plans and the financial strain of eating out frequently.


Happy planning! If you have tips on grocery shopping and meal planning, I'd love to hear them!

Small Beginnings

My days are currently filled with lots of sitting. Sitting to nurse the baby, sitting to hold the baby, sitting to read to my toddler, sitting to do schoolwork with the older kids. In fact, I’m finding it hard to be up enough just to get the dishes done or food on the table. Forget cleaning the house!

I had forgotten what it’s like to have a toddler and a newborn. I’ve done this several other times (even a newborn with three toddlers!), but it was several years ago. And now, with so many older kids who don’t nap it’s much harder to keep the house tidy and keep up with all that needs to get done.

I’m not complaining. Motherhood is the career I’ve always wanted. I’m thrilled that I have the privilege of teaching my children at home … knowing them so well and seeing firsthand the growth in character, body, mind, and spirit. But I will admit that it’s been frustrating for me to have life slow down to a near stop as we adjust once more to having a newborn in the house.

The other night Josh and I were discussing something completely unrelated to parenting when he rattled off a verse that caused me to stop him midsentence. I was so struck by what he had just said that I ditched our conversation and had him point me to the specific Bible verse he had quoted.

“Do not despise these small beginnings, for the LORD rejoices to see the work begin.” (Zechariah 4:10 NLT)

This is a verse that needs to be plastered throughout my house. If I could see my own forehead throughout the day, I’d write it there. This verse should be touted as a banner verse for mothering … for parents everywhere who are frustrated by the slow progress and repetitive nature of raising children.

Today, as I go through my day of nursing the baby again, washing the dishes once more, folding another set of clean clothes, picking up the toys that were just cleaned up an hour ago, re-explaining a math concept for the four hundred and sixty-seventh time, desperately trying to come up with a new and fresh way to drive home the importance of respect … in short, parenting yet another day moment by moment … this verse rings through my head. And I am reminded that these small beginnings are just that – the beginning. I am teaching skills that will be necessary throughout my child’s life. Skills that they will someday teach to their own children. Skills that will aid them in the workplace, the home, the community, the church. My job may feel redundant and mundane, but it is essential. And the Lord rejoices to see me begin these small things with my children.

Am I taking the verse out of context here? Yes. And I know that. But the overall pattern of Scripture shows a God who uses ordinary people in insignificant places doing small things to transform the world. This verse so pierced my heart and convicted me of my own selfish attitude in regards to motherhood. If I’m honest with myself, I can see that I often despise the small things throughout my day. I sigh when I see the dishes in the sink, I inwardly groan when faced with another mountain of laundry, I complain in the middle of the night when another child wakens needing Mommy. But this is what I am called to and if I can see the joy in beginning these small things with my children, the work will not be as heavy. As the Lord rejoices in giving these good gifts of children to me, I can rejoice in the not-so-small work of laying a firm foundation for their lives.

Large Family Car Travel Tips: Keeping Kids Occupied

Often when I research things about large families, I come up with tips for families that have only 2-4 children. We are a family of 8 (soon). These travel posts are to help bigger families figure out how to survive days of road travel with minimal tension, whining, and stress. Hope it helps, and happy travels!

Other travel posts in this series:
Snacks
Suitcase Organization
Keeping the Car Organized
Special Tips You May Not Know



Let's be honest. Keeping kids happy means keeping your sanity. Our most recent trip included days upon days of driving. So I spent weeks upon weeks working to prepare for it. I spent way more time preparing things to keep the kids busy than I did wondering what to pack or even looking forward to our vacation time. To save you the same amount of preparation, here are some of the tried and true activities that helped us pass the time in busy peace. Our kids all pack their own backpacks with toys and activities, but it's good for mom and dad to have a few surprises waiting.



We've all seen the seek and find jars. These were super easy to make and the kids loved them. I made two that were identical. Just fill a jar with rice (plastic jars are better than glass in case little hands drop them), take pictures of little things found around the house, and place those items in the jar. Then you can print out a card with all the pictures of what the kids need to find, hot glue it to the lid of the jar, and hot glue the lid onto the jar. Be sure to glue the lid. Unless you want rice all over your car.

While we're on the subject of seek and find, if your kids are like mine seek and find books or Where's Waldo books can occupy them for hours. Seriously, hours. Well worth the price of the books.



Those of you with little ones know how excited they get about pictures of family members or things they love. My little one is particularly fascinated with fluffy animals. I purchased 2 little flip photo albums from the dollar store and filled them with pictures printed from my computer. One was all pictures of animals and the other had various items he would recognize from daily life. Things like toys, balls, toes, and foods. He loved them! And since I didn't allow him to play with them before the trip, they were completely new and exciting for him. (On a side note, it helps to actually tape the pictures inside the photo protectors so that little hands can't pull them out.)



Other cheap activities use pipe cleaners and aluminum foil. Pipe cleaners can be bent and re-bent into dozens of different things. If you give kids a variety of colors, they can stay busy for quite some time. Aluminum foil is also great for creativity. Rip off several sections of aluminum foil for each child and let them sculpt the foil into little armies, animals or other fun things. Just be sure they understand the expectation that at the end of the day the sculptures head to the trash. Otherwise you'll have aluminum foil "masterpieces" throughout your vehicle for a long time.



Traveling at nighttime can be tough. The driver needs to keep the lights off inside the vehicle, but it's hard for kids to stay occupied in the dark. The dollar store has little mini clip lights that kids can use for reading or drawing.

And I have yet to meet a kid who will object to having a few glow sticks to play with. Depending on what your kids like, you can get the sticks, the necklaces, the bracelets, or any other assortment of glowing fun. These can also be found at the dollar store for a much cheaper price than places like WalMart or Target. Besides, if you end up at a hotel without a pool, you can always throw a couple of glow sticks into the bathtub for some swimming fun in your room.



Another terrific idea for our toddler was to bring a cookie sheet and some magnetic cars. You can see by the picture how much he loved it! Some car seats have arm rests that include a space between the bottom of the arm rest and the rest of the chair. In such cases, attaching the cookie sheet to the car seat is a piece of cake. Our car seat doesn't have arm "handles" so we ended up drilling holes in the tray and then created a long strap to go around the back of his car seat. We left the cookie sheet hooked to the strap on one side (which also allowed it to hang down against the side of the car when not in use) and just hooked it to the other side of the strap when ready to use it. I picked up a few strong, round magnets at the hardware store and stuck them on the bottom of a few matchbox cars.



Be sure the bottom of the car is flat or else you'll have trouble getting the magnets to stick.



We also used other cookie sheets for our older kids. Our first grader was given a metal tin full of magnetic numbers and letters and he enjoyed spelling out various words. For older kids you can cut out pictures of facial features from magazines and laminate them. Stick magnets on the back and kids have a great time making all sorts of silly faces on their cookie sheets.



In years past, one of the frustrations while driving has been when our kids drop their pencils and crayons. Of course, we want them to stay in their seatbelts, but it can create a long and whiny wait when they can't reach their writing tools until the next rest stop. We've tried tying pencils on to clipboards in the past, and that has worked well, but when space is an issue even a clipboard per child can feel like a space hog. And many clipboards are either too small for a regular sized piece of paper or too large to fit in a child's backpack. For this trip, I used a small zippered bag for each child. In these bags they received two mechanical pencils (so the leads didn't break and leave them useless) of a specific color, a box of new crayons, one dry erase marker, their book light for nighttime, and a small travel pack of tissues. The marker and tissues came in handy for use with their binders (explained below), and the crayons, pencils, and light eliminated the bickering caused by having to share. Plus, by giving each child a specific pencil color I knew who was missing theirs each time we unpacked the van.



The travel binders I made for the kids were tremendously helpful! Each child had a three ring binder filled with various activities and fun papers. Some papers were reusable because they were placed in page protectors and the kids were able to use their dry erase markers to write and a tissue to clean it off. This allowed them to play tic tac toe and travel bingo again and again. Other papers had coloring activities printed from the internet or copied from our own coloring books. And others were given to inspire creativity.



These papers had them creating silly faces, designing cars to get us to our destination faster, imagining what they would do with a thousand dollars, etc. I packed an extra set of papers for each binder to replace the used ones for our trip home. That way, the binders would once again be fresh and new. My favorite paper asked them to draw or write about the best part of the trip. Those papers are great for putting in the scrapbook once you return home!


Of course there are so many other things you can do. One of our children has a kindle and enjoyed several hours playing games and reading on that. A friend lent us a few leap pads and the kids were quietest when playing on those. However, with electronics, it's good to limit the amount of time the kids spend on them each day. Not only can they strain their eyes, but extended use of electronics can also contribute to motion sickness and sore necks. Electronics for toddlers are a little harder to come by, but a friend let us borrow a personal dvd player. About once a day, we'd turn on a Thomas the Tank Engine video and our 18 month old would happily pass through his fussy time of day.

Another life saver in the car was having the sense to bring a few blankets along and to keep the kids' pillows within reach. If anyone was tired enough to nap, they could do so comfortably. And the blankets were great for moderating the temperature in the car with several differing opinions being heard from the backseat.



Having a deck of cards on hand, a few travel games, and a couple of dollar store surprises keeps even a long ride manageable. With a little prep and creativity you can easily pass the hours and days peacefully ... and hopefully happily!

Flash Back to the Future

I'm sitting with a sweet little cuddly boy on my lap. Today he is 19 months old and he has a new fascination with trains. Which means he loves watching Thomas the Tank Engine. It's a special treat since we rarely have the TV on, but today he needed a little mommy time. I have a cold and don't feel great, so a little snuggle time in front of the TV was a perfect option.

As he watches, I can see his adorable profile. His build, hair, and profile remind me so much of his older brother. And as I looked at his sweet face moments ago, I had a vision from days gone by of his older brother sitting and watching Thomas. Enjoying the show with the same interest, the same comfortable, chubby, snuggly little body, the big, blueberry eyes gazing intently at the television.

Today was different though, because as I gazed at my little sunshine, remembering days from years ago, I could see his big brother sitting in the background. Also watching Thomas, but now much bigger. His lanky legs span the length of the couch, he has lost all his baby fat. His hair is still unruly, but somehow it still makes him look older. His feet are so much bigger and smellier than those cute little bricks I used to kiss all day long.

I realized that when this little one on my lap reaches the age his brother is now, big brother will be 20. He'll likely be out of my house, grown, possibly even on his way to marriage! He'll have his sights set on a career, he'll be a man. And the most intense years of my influence will have passed.

I tried to imagine what our little one will be like in 10 years. But just as I can't imagine my big boy as a 20 year old, I also can't imagine my baby as a big boy of 11.

It brought to mind Psalm 90 which talks about the brevity of life, and God's eternal nature. It contains a plea for God to teach us to use our days wisely and to find joy in our work.

Indeed, Lord, grant me joy in the moments of my work as a mother. For as I am finding, those moments accumulate and pass much more quickly than I expect or desire.


Psalm 90
Lord, you have been our dwelling place throughout all generations. Before the mountains were born or you brought forth the earth and the world, from everlasting to everlasting you are God. You turn men back to dust, saying, "Return to dust, O sons of men." For a thousand years in your sight are like a day that has just gone by, or like a watch in the night. You sweep men away in the sleep of death; they are like the new grass of the morning-- though in the morning it springs up new, by evening it is dry and withered. We are consumed by your anger and terrified by your indignation. You have set our iniquities before you, our secret sins in the light of your presence. All our days pass away under your wrath; we finish our years with a moan. The length of our days is seventy years-- or eighty, if we have the strength; yet their span is but trouble and sorrow, for they quickly pass, and we fly away. Who knows the power of your anger? For your wrath is as great as the fear that is due you. Teach us to number our days aright, that we may gain a heart of wisdom. Relent, O LORD! How long will it be? Have compassion on your servants. Satisfy us in the morning with your unfailing love, that we may sing for joy and be glad all our days. Make us glad for as many days as you have afflicted us, for as many years as we have seen trouble. May your deeds be shown to your servants, your splendor to their children. May the favor of the Lord our God rest upon us; establish the work of our hands for us-- yes, establish the work of our hands.

Large Family Car Travel Tips: Snacks

Often when I research things about large families, I come up with tips for families that have only 2-4 children. We are a family of 8 (soon). These travel posts are to help bigger families figure out how to survive days of road travel with minimal tension, whining, and stress. Hope it helps, and happy travels!


Other posts in this travel series:
Suitcase Organization
Special Tips You May Not Know
Keeping the Car Organized
Keeping Kids Occupied


Okay, let's be honest. One of the toughest things about traveling is keeping the kids well fed and happy in the car, but not having to stop every 10 minutes for someone to use the potty. My kids drink a lot. A LOT. They are always thirsty - especially if they're bored in the car. We also have at least one child with an incredibly small bladder. We've been training our kids for quite some time now that when they first feel the urge to go, they actually have about a half hour before they really have to go. That knowledge does help when traveling. Especially in states like Nebraska or New Mexico. There's really nothing for miles and miles and miles ...

However, much as we'd like to postpone potty breaks until they are convenient, we also don't want to deprive our children of fluids. So, we have small water bottles with their names on them. These are metal and have a top that won't spill much even if dumped while open. We fill these in the morning or whenever needed and let the kids have them in the car where they sit. I know some people have the policy of no food or drink in the car, but really, water can't do too much damage. The kids are allowed to drink whenever they want so long as they understand the concept of possibly having to wait up to a half hour to find a restroom. And whenever we do find a restroom, everyone tries to go. Even mom and dad. Otherwise, someone will have to go five minutes after you get on the road again.



Not only do we allow drinks in the car, we also allow snacks. Most of our kids are old enough to clean up after themselves and those that aren't are fed by hand from one of the older kids. We try not to pack really messy snacks and always make sure we have trash recepticles on hand. And it's important to remember to empty the trash every time you stop at a gas station - especially if you have fresh fruit leftovers in the trash!

So here are some ideas for snacks:
Fresh fruit: oranges, grapes, bananas, apples, raisins, craisins ... I'd suggest keeping the grapes in a plastic container with a paper towel on the bottom. Be sure to wash them first! And with the oranges, you'll want to wait and peel them on the day you plan to eat them.



Veggies: carrot sticks, broccoli trees, cherry tomatoes. This all really just depends on what your kids are willing to eat. Celery sticks with peanut butter are also great! And peanut butter now can be bought in little individual packets! Genius!

Snacky stuff: Fruit snacks (gummies in our house), animal crackers, granola bars, cheese or pb filled crackers, pretzels - which are also great for car sickness, mini bagels, goldfish, teddy grahams or graham crackers.

Homemade goodies: Muffins, cookies, homemade granola, trail mix, energy bites.

Spoon foods: pudding, applesauce, jello, yogurt.


One of the favorite things we've done on a long trip is bring special treat bags for each new state we encounter on the way there and the way back. As soon as we cross a state, we all cheer and then everyone gets a treat. It helps to break up the trip and recognize little milestones along the way. These bags have the only candy we allow in the car. Things like smarties, reeses cups, gum (great for states with high elevations), fruit roll ups, etc. Find treats that your kids rarely get and they'll be so excited about each step of the journey.

Large Family Car Travel Tips: Suitcase Organization

Often when I research things about large families, I come across tips for families that have only 2-4 children. We are a family of 8 (soon). These travel posts are to help bigger families figure out how to survive days of road travel with minimal tension, whining, and stress. Hope it helps, and happy travels!

Other travel posts in this series:
Special Tips You May Not Know
Keeping the Car Organized
Snacks
Keeping Kids Occupied



If your family is planning a trip that will have you on the road for several days at a time, it really pays to be organized in your packing. Our most recent trip included up to 8 days on the road at a time - with 7 family members and no laundry service. My husband didn't want to haul in every suitcase to each hotel, so I devised a system that allowed us to stay organized and be sure to have adequate clothing for everyone.

We packed our clothing in smaller suitcases. This allowed us to fit exactly two days worth of clothes in each suitcase. The second day's clothes were packed on the bottom of the suitcase like so:



On top of the suitcase divider, we packed the first day's clothes. When repacking the suitcase the next day, I took everything out and put the dirties on the bottom and the clean clothes on the top. It worked beautifully!

Another vital trick was to label each suitcase by day. I simply used laminated index cards with the name of the days listed on the card. These were tied to each suitcase and it was a sinch for hubby to pull out the right suitcase each night as we unloaded the van.



It would have been impossible for us to fit two days of 7 sets of clothes PLUS PJs in each suitcase. Instead, I used a separate bag for all PJs. My kids tend to get things dirty quickly, so I packed 1 pair of PJs for every two days. For the baby, I packed a few extras just in case. Mom and Dad needed less, but we were still able to fit all PJs in one bag to be brought in each night. As the PJs became dirty, we simply shifted them to the bottom of the bag and put fresh ones on top for the next night. And yes, go ahead and label the bag "PJs" so that you know exactly which bag to bring in each night.

We were also planning on attending church while on the road. We used another bag to only hold fancy clothes. Of course, they needed ironing the night before use, but it was easy to find them. Our last labeled bag of clothing was for seasonal items. Because we were going from winter weather to summer and back again, we had to pack sweatshirts AND shorts. These items went in a separate bag so we knew where to find them when needed, but they didn't have to be pulled out of the van at every stop.

It is important absolutely necessary to keep a separate bag of one change of clean clothes for everyone somewhere accessible in the van. These should not be counted as actual travel clothes, but rather an extra set for emergencies. Having dealt with throw up, pee, and lot of spills I can tell you that this bag is essential to happy travel!! Pack extras for babies who may have a blow out and for toddlers who are more likely to spill. Even if you are a parent with a stomach of steel, you never know when you'll get gross while traveling with kids. It's important to keep a change of clothes for yourself in this bag as well.

If you're headed to a destination where you can swim (which would include most hotels), you'll want to keep your swim stuff separate so you can grab it quickly and bring it into the hotel. We love using the Large Utility Tote from Thirty One for our swim stuff. In fact, our suits and towels stay in it year round and whenever we're off to have some water fun, we simply grab the bag and know that everything we need is there. If you fold your towels carefully, you can fit up to ten stacked on one side of the bag. In the leftover space, fold the swimsuits and coverups, pack some swim diapers, and don't forget the sunscreen. Thirty One even sells covers for these bags now, so you don't have to worry about stuff falling out. Win win!

(In the top picture, our swim bag is the one on the bottom right with the big flowers.)



The last item you'll need is not a suitcase, but may be even more important than the clothes you pack. Keep a throw up bucket on hand in the car. Be sure it's within reach of Mom and Dad and pack it with a roll of paper towels, some wet wipes, a water bottle and trash bags. The trash bags are essential to have for clean up. And you'll want more than one bag. You may need one for clothes and one for trash. You can either buy a little bucket to be used for this purpose or turn a gallon milk jug into one. Cut around the mouth of the milk jug and halfway down the front, leaving the handle in tact. These are the buckets I grew up traveling with. Free, disposable, and handy.

I can't promise that following these tips will make everything easy on your trip, but it will make packing, unpacking, and repacking each day sooo much easier. Happy travels!

Large Family Car Travel Tips: Keeping the Car Organized

Often when I research things about large families, I come up with tips for families that have only 2-4 children. We are a family of 8 (soon). These travel posts are to help bigger families figure out how to survive days of road travel with minimal tension, whining, and stress. Hope it helps, and happy travels!


Other travel posts in this series:
Special Tips You May Not Know
Suitcase Organization
Snacks
Keeping Kids Occupied

Trash cans
You'll want to have trash cans within reach of everyone. With younger children this will minimize the mess of passing items forward or back in the van. It also keeps mom and dad from being needed constantly whenever food is being consumed - which in turn allows you to focus on driving. And it helps the kids take responsibility for the vehicle's cleanliness. We used square utility totes from Thirty One lined with plastic bags, but even just a small trash can would do.

Utilize under the seat storage!
With a big family, you need every spare inch of space! Don't forget about the storage under seats. Even if your seats are low to the floor, you can still find small things that will fit underneath. If your van is like ours, you can fit larger items underneath your seats. This is a great area to store things you won't need to access frequently but still need for the trip. And underneath the front passenger seat is a perfect place to put that first aid kit that you'll invariably need.

Pack music you can all stand
This is sooo important! With younger kids it's easy to pack a bunch of toddler songs. Trust me, you'll go crazy if that's all you listen to for days on end! Likewise, if your teens like a certain genre of music that just grates on your nerves, either get the teen an ipod, or find a compromise by listening to some of their music and some of yours. One of the great things about vehicles these days is that you can set the music to play mostly in the front or back of the car.

For those without ipods, remember that a smart phone can also store music and typically will have a headphone jack. This can allow parents to listen to their own stuff on the phone while having kid music on in the car. And if you want some great kid music that most parents can stand check out Go Fish. Their harmonies are terrific and the music is fun.

Bin for cords
I can't take credit for thinking this one up, but it's a lifesaver. Grab a shoebox sized plastic bin at the dollar store and use it to keep all cords for electronics contained in one place. It's easy to grab as you head into a hotel for the night, and it allows you to find the cord you need quickly and easily.

Label suitcases



We tried this on our recent trip and it was incredibly useful! Before packing I laminated index cards that had days listed on them. I then used ribbon to tie these onto the suitcases so we knew which bags were needed for which nights. It made unpacking the car each night so much easier and massively decreased my husband's frustration at having to bring in unnecessary suitcases.

Keep food organized and dole out snacks by day instead of prepping all before the trip



I'll be honest, this sounds great. But if you're on the road for a long time, it's a little harder to stay motivated. But for our first week, we did really well with this. We brought lots of fruit, veggies, and snacks with us. But instead of peeling all oranges before leaving the house, we just peeled them on the day we planned to eat them. Once peeled, we put them in their own container and then doled them out as needed in the car. Same with the grapes, apples, cheese sticks, goldfish, etc. We had a large bin full of snack items, a bin with bread and other lunch items, one with paper goods and a few knives, and a large cooler filled with drinks and refrigerated items. Instead of trying to access each bin in the middle of a drive, we just prepped things before leaving in the morning and then were set for the day.

Try to keep like items together - clothes, activities, snacks. Certain things must be in reach of the parents, others can hang out in the back
Suitcases just aren't needed while driving. Neither are swim gear, cots, sleeping bags, etc. However, you will need to access toys, activities, food items, trash recepticles, etc. Make sure your throw up bucket is also accessible! Doing whatever you can to have necessary items within reach will greatly decrease the amount of stops you have to make and the frustration level of mom and dad.

Use a grabber to get things to kids in the back



If you have a van, chances are you can't always reach your children. When handing out food, toys, tissues, etc., it's very helpful to have a grabber. These can often be found at toy shops and novelty stores. We've had ours for years and still love it!

Large Family Car Travel Tips: Special Tips You May Not Know

Often when I research things for large families, I come across tips for families that have only 2-4 children. We are a family of 8 (soon). These travel posts are to help bigger families figure out how to survive days of road travel with minimal tension, whining, and stress. Hope it helps, and happy travels!

Other travel posts in this series:
Keeping the Car Organized
Suitcase Organization
Snacks
Keeping Kids Occupied




Expect the unexpected!
From switching hotels because of filth, to driving extra hours in a day, to massive sightseeing plans obliterated by a snowstorm ... you have to be ready to roll with the punches when traveling as a family. We've had so much go wrong over our years of roadtrips, but most of it has created fun and lasting memories. We've had a few ER visits, a cartop carrier fly off the van on the highway, detours that lasted hours, traffic jams, horrible illness, car troubles that had us walking a mile with a baby to the nearest hotel in the middle of the night, and much, much more. When you are able to look at the situation calmly you'll make better decisions and be able to lead your family in a much more gentle way. No trip will go exactly as planned or hoped, so expect to have a few bumps on the road and pray that you can laugh at it in the days to come.

Plan kid activities in chunks
We've found that giving kids chunks of time to do things makes the day go faster. For two hours, have them play with the stuff in their backpacks. Then get out a snack and an activity that will last an hour or so. Next stop for lunch. After that, a movie can take up the next two hours while any babies nap. Continue the day in this way, and you'll find the kids are happier. Not only does it remind you to keep food in their bellies, but it also forces you to stop every few hours to get out new activities. Breaks for stretching and bathroom visits will keep the whole family in a better mood.

Drink those fluids!
Don't allow yourself to become dehydrated so you can avoid bathroom breaks. Your body needs the fluid to keep you going - especially lots of water! Water will even help with those swollen hands and feet that come from salty take out food and long hours of sitting. Bathroom breaks don't have to be long, but they need to happen. Plus, a little fresh air and stretching will help your brain stay alert as you drive.

Laundry in hotels
Personally I haven't had to take advantage of this service. But it's good to know about just in case. When in a pinch, many hotels will allow their guests to use the laundry services for a fee. The fee and policies will vary by hotel, but if you've had a child get sick in the car, this is a great option to avoid a late-night run to the laundromat.

Check food policies
Did you know that some hotels don't offer a complimentary breakfast? And some will include a complimentary dinner with your stay! We love staying at the Drury Inn. Not only do they give you a hot breakfast each morning, but they also have a dinner option in the evening. The hotel puts out hot foods - simple fare such has hot dogs, nachos, baked potatoes - and you can feed your family for FREE! (Well, it's really in the hotel cost, but it feels free.) They also have a complimentary drink for each adult and beverages for all hotel guests. And popcorn. Not to mention that we've always found the Drury to have excellent service and cleanliness.

AAA and hotel points
Perhaps you don't have AAA. I would argue that it's worth getting even just for one long road trip. Why? Most hotels and sightseeing places will offer a discount for AAA members. You can also request trip tickets from AAA to help you plan your journey. These are brochures that tell all about the areas you hope to visit. Lastly, God forbid you get stranded on the road! But if you do, AAA will pay for itself by coming to the rescue. We arrived in one city and had no clue what to do. We stopped by the local AAA office and received a bag full of ideas. Sooo helpful!

In regards to the hotel points ... some hotel chains offer credit cards that allow you to book within their company and earn points toward a free hotel stay. We got the Choice Hotels card for our recent trip and looked online to find which hotels in each location were within that company. For the most part we were very happy with the hotels, and the one time we weren't we received a full refund after canceling our reservation. The card also helped us to find some great deals online for hotels in this chain - a must for a family as big as ours which requires two rooms each night.
And after 5-6 nights, we earned a free stay at our next hotel. Totally worth it!

Stop!
Kids just don't handle trips the way adults do. Adults can push through for hours on end in the car. For us, it's easy to rationalize fewer stops by getting to the end goal faster. For kids, it's different. They aren't watching the miles tick by. They are agonizing as the minutes seem to pass slower and slower! Letting them out to run and stretch every couple of hours will actually HELP your travel. When our kids get tired of being in the car, they begin making up reasons to stop: I don't feel well, I need to go potty, my legs are cramping. In the end, we have found that stopping at regular intervals allows us to reach our destination more quickly than if we just power through and end up with lots of made-up excuses toward the end of the trip.

Check the toll road rules.
If driving through Illinois, get an IPass. Otherwise, it'll cost you double if you pay cash at each tollway. The Ipass also works in states that use the EZPass - which seems to be used most in the Midwest and East Coast.

Army cots and sleeping bags
Having a couple of army cots is not only helpful for guests at home and camping in summer, but are also great in hotel rooms. They cost little, take up little space in the car (can usually fit under seats), only require a sleeping bag and pillow, and work beautifully in hotel rooms. If kids tend to argue about bedspace when sharing a bed, these are a life saver! Or if you have a large family like ours. :)

Remember to keep social security numbers on hand
There is a chance you'll run into medical issues while traveling. During our most recent trip, our littlest had a run in with a rusty nail. Because I didn't have his social security number on hand, I was unable to access his records online to see if he needed a tetanus shot. Our doctor's office was closed and it was a huge hassle to figure out whether or not we needed to visit an urgent care facility. Just remember to NOT put names with the numbers. We keep ours written on a small piece of paper in a special spot and have a code to remember which number belongs to which child. Just be careful! If those numbers are ever found and matched with names, it could spell big trouble for you!

People are Watching ...

We have received many varied reactions to our family over the years. Some people smile and say how blessed we are to have so many children. Others look at us with horror and give a litany of excuses of why they wouldn't dare have more than one or two kids. We're used to it and it rarely fazes us anymore. But this trip and specifically the reactions we have received in California have surprised us.

A lot of people have been quite negative in their comments to us. One woman boldly ordered that I had better not be working outside the home. I agree, but not for the reasons she apparently thought important. To her it was the work load of having this many kids that was daunting. For me it's the eternally significant task of being around to teach and train them.

We have had people stare open-mouthed and even point at us as we unloaded from the van at rest stops and parks. Many, many people have asked about my pregnancy and the sex of this baby - only to express extreme disappointment and condolences because we're having another boy. We're not disappointed and we'd prefer congratulations. This is another precious life given to us.

The most shocking rudeness came as we waited for the elevator in a hotel. An elderly lady was also waiting to use the elevator. When she saw us, she blatantly informed us that she'd rather not ride on the elevator with us. No one else was waiting, it was just our family and her, and the elevator could have easily held twice that many people. Josh and I bit back a few choice words and agreed to wait while she took the elevator alone to her floor. (And this was after she had already yelled at David who kindly helped her push the button when she couldn't get it to light up.) We then tried to explain to our bewildered children what had just happened. Frankly, I don't think we understand it!

But in with the bad, there has also been some good. Many couples have stopped to count as we file past. Sometimes, they get a big grin and tell us how wonderfully blessed we are. We always smile, heartily agree, and thank them. We have received several comments on the good behavior and helpfulness of our children. That always makes our hearts glow! And we received one comment that really caused us to stop and think.

We were eating dinner in a buffet-style restaurant. We had all gotten our food and were enjoying the meal when a family walked by on their way out. The husband and wife stopped next to where Josh and I sat and said, "Your kids are so well behaved! You must be religious."

It took us a few moments to recover from that statement. No stranger has ever made the jump from good kids to faith-based training before. Josh thanked them and told them that he is a pastor and we enjoyed a nice conversation with them for several minutes. We didn't exchange names or much information, but their comment has stuck with me and caused me to think about the reactions our family receives and how we ought to respond.

There are three things that come to mind as I reflect on the varied comments our family receives:

1. People really are watching. It may seem that you move in obscurity. It may seem that nobody is noticing you. But even strangers see you. Whether out of curiosity or boredom, self-pride or admiration, people do watch and make judgments. Many of those people-watchers are willing to share their opinions of you as well - solicited or not. Be sure that you are acting in a way that reflects well on who you are because opinions are made in the space of seconds.

2. Those who don't want to listen, won't. We recently had a conversation with someone who specifically asked where we are from. We informed her that we had driven from Wisconsin. In the next sentence, she instead identified us as being from Utah. Even after being corrected a few times, she continued to talk of the "fact" that we hailed from Utah. Apparently a family this large must be Mormon! People who have made up their minds are often unwilling to listen. Just move on.

3. Given that people are watching and often ready to share opinions, be ready with your response. Sometimes you'll be thrown a curve-ball like we were as we waited for the elevator. But many comments are repeats. For those, your response is likely the only chance you'll get to reflect what you believe. As a Christian, my response either represents Christ well or has the power to do damage. Be gracious, be slow to judge, point to the One from whom all blessings flow. For us, most comments are directly related to family size. We expect people to say things like, "Wow! How do you survive with that many kids?" or "Don't you know what causes that?!" The latter is my personal favorite. Josh and I have started responding with a sly grin, a knowing nod, and a "Mmm hmmm". That usually shuts them up. But for questions that deserve an answer, we try to think carefully before responding. Sure, we have bad days with our kids and sometimes people catch us on those rough days. But we are still thankful for the opportunity to raise them, know them, and influence them. Our response to comments rude or kind should reflect our thankfulness - not our rough day.

1 Peter 3:15 But in your hearts set apart Christ as Lord. Always be prepared to give an answer to everyone who asks you to give the reason for the hope that you have. But do this with gentleness and respect.

Boy or Girl? Ultrasound Results are In!

We had our ultrasound today for baby #6. And while I'd love to show you pictures, my scanner isn't cooperating with my computer.

First, let me say that this little one is healthy and growing well. We could see the little fingers and toes, legs and arms. What a wonderful sight!

We brought the kids with us to the ultrasound and showed them their little sibling on the screen. Jesse began to dance when the baby's heartbeat was put on speaker. I can just imagine that these two will be thick as theives and likely get into much trouble together!

We did find out today that my due date is a bit off. By my calculations, I should be 19 weeks along. Apparently getting pregnant while nursing can cause your dates to be a bit off. So, now I'm due May 10th instead of May 1st. Which actually works out much better in my spring schedule. (And yes, I'm being a little silly here. But really it will be much easier to travel halfway across the country in March if the baby is a little smaller.)

And now, I know you're all dying to know if it's a boy or a girl. So many of you have said how you're praying for a girl so that Abby can have a sister. She has also been echoing that same prayer. But Josh and I have always said that we want whatever the Lord feels will fit best in our family. He must want us to have a full boy's basketball team because we're getting our fifth BOY!! There's no doubt about gender after how this little guy was showing off during the ultrasound.

We're so thankful for this little man and are praising God for knittng him together in such a perfect way. Please continue to pray for his health and growth as we continue through the pregnancy.

And for those of you feeling sorry for Abby - it's not all bad. She's the only Brumbaugh kid who will be able to have her own room. Quite a perk in a house with six kids!

Teen Expectations

Linking up with the MOB (Mothers of Boys) Society today.


Earlier today I posted the following article onto my facebook page. It was mainly in response to a couple of friends who were struggling with their teens and some rebellion issues. However, if you've been on facebook for long, you've likely seen this floating around. Take a moment and read it.

I wasn't expecting to receive any responses from it - let alone the passionate remarks it stirred. And given that I have some strong thoughts on teens in our society, I figured I'd write my response here instead of in several long comments on my facebook status.

I may have young children, but I also have two boys on the cusp of being teens. In fact, I do consider my 12 and a half year old a teen because of his maturity level. Because of this, I've been giving much thought over the last year to how I should approach the teen years with my children. I don't want to settle for the status quo of backtalk, rebellion, and stupid decisions. I'm not naive - I do know some of that will occur, but I certainly hope it will not be the norm for my children.

To that end, I've had my oldest read a book entitled "Do Hard Things" by Brett and Alex Harris. It's an excellent call for teens to go beyond the low expectations of society and meet their potential. I blogged a bit about it here if you are interested. The basic premise is that around the world and throughout history, teens have been expected to do ... something. They aren't just children still living at home. They aren't yet adults. But they are adults in training who no longer want to be considered children. And their capabilities are amazing!

As parents it's our responsibility to give our children wings as they approach adulthood. You give them the opportunity to make choices, to fail or soar, to feel the consequences of their actions (good or bad) within the safety of your home and care. You guide with tough love, much grace, and unending forgiveness. And most importantly, you must model with your own life the type of adult you hope your child will become.

In almost all other societies, teens are considered productive members of society. They are expected to contribute, to add to the community and to the family. They are not permitted to live in fantasy or seek out "fun" unless the work is done. And work isn't just homework. It may be chores at home or on the farm, it may be a steady job. It may be hard and it may be inconvenient and it may be dirty. But teens are capable, strong, and smart. They can do much more than we in America give them credit for!

My problem with our society is that I see so many young twenty somethings living in their parents' basement, playing video games, and avoiding the job market. I'm not talking about honest, hardworking young adults who just need a boost to get on their feet. I'm talking about the MANY who are avoiding adulthood in favor of continuing a childhood that has stretched much too far. This isn't some nebulus group of people "out there". I've met them. They're in our town, they are people I care for.

So what to do? Is it right to just yell at kids and say "Do more. Get a job. Do chores. Read books." No, that won't do it. It falls to the parents. WE are the ones who must teach responsibility to our children. WE are the ones who must push our children to their potential while also providing a safe place to fail. WE must encourage, cheer, and reward successes.

Before writing this, I shared the article with my two oldest boys at the dinner table. I told them nothing of what I was about to read except that I wanted their opinions. I stressed that I'd be fine with them having differing opinions of each other and of the article. I read it, and I waited.

Both said they thought the article was right on. One said he felt it was a little harsh in the wording but that he agreed with the premise. I asked them to explain their thought process in agreeing - still not having voiced my opinion - and they shared that they know they are capable of much more than what is typically required of kids. They feel they can be important and productive. They want to have responsibility.

I didn't have to ask my next question, because I already knew the answer. They also want to be kids. And therein is the conundrum of teens. Part kid, part adult. They need time to play, to be silly, to hang out with friends, to get some extra sleep as they grow. But when we let that be the entirety of teen life, we're actually doing our children harm, not good. How is that preparing them for adulthood? How does silliness ready them for a job or marriage? How does expecting them to cop an attitude contribute to their well-being?

We tell our kids when they talk back to us that it's unacceptable. And we tell them why. Not only are they to respect their parents under God's laws, but under man's laws, they can be fired from a job for sassing their boss. If you are rude to those you meet, you'll soon be a lonely human being. You'll quickly burn bridges and you'll lose the respect of those around you.

It's the same when we give our children chores and responsibilities. My children have school year round. They also have chores year round. They are required to help in the garden in summer. They vacuum, clean bathrooms, do dishes, wash laundry, and help with their younger siblings. Am I stealing their childhood? I don't believe I am. I do expect a lot from my children, but I don't expect more than they can do. I would never ask a 4 year old to get out the big vacuum and clean the floors. The vacuum is as big as he is! It would be an unrealistic and frustrating expectation. Instead, I ask my 4 year old to make sure he puts two rolls of toilet paper on each toilet in the house so that we don't have issues of running out while someone is on the pot. He has the satisfaction of contributing to the household in an age appropriate way.

It's the same with our teens. I wouldn't normally ask my oldest to simply put toilet paper on the toilets because he is capable of so much more. Instead, he is the one cleaning the toilets. He is the one vacuuming. He's capable, he feels good when he has accomplished the task. And here's the kicker. When he's done with work, he's free to play. It's not an exclusive issue. Teens need the play and the responsibility. But the play should come AFTER the responsibility, not before. And that's where much of our society has it backwards. Many want their kids to have all the fun they can and if there's time left over they can help out. Because of this, we're raising lazy adults who feel entitled to an easy lifestyle and are going into massive amounts of debt to acheive that lifestyle.

All this to say: Love your kids. Love them enough to help them reach their potential - in all areas of life. Take a good look at their capabilities and give them the respect they long for by recognizing how mature they can be if given the chance. And when they fail, which they will, be there to help them back up, encourage them onward, and celebrate when they succeed the next time around.

A Boring Past

Today I was washing the dishes. Thankfully that's becoming a less frequent chore for me because of the many little minions I have in the house. Let me tell you, mothers of young children, there really is a time coming where your kids will handle many of the household chores. Oh blessed day! For example, just today my kids cleaned all four bathrooms, vacuumed the main level of the house, folded laundry, and picked up. You'd think I'd be a lady of leisure by now, but alas, there is always still much more to do than I have hours in my day.

Anyway, I was washing the dishes. Honestly, I was a bit grumbly in my heart. I knew that I was just washing the dishes in order to dirty them again by making a delicious dinner for the family. And it was me washing them because I wanted my kids to enjoy the gorgeous weather outside instead of being stuck inside just before winter.

As I washed and grumbled in my heart, my oldest - who was icing a jammed finger - made a comment that stopped me in my tracks. He said, "People sure must have been bored in the olden days."

What?

I asked him to repeat the statement to be sure that I had heard correctly and then asked him to explain his thinking on that ridiculous statement. He simply replied that he figured they just had a lot less to do back then.

Oh, my poor misguided child!

I quickly launched into a long diatribe describing how much more work they had. They didn't have electric or gas stoves. They had to chop their own wood to heat their houses. Showering wasn't done quickly and with ease most nights of the week. There were no dishwashers, no garbage disposals, no plastic diapers. Farming was much more difficult without the modern machinery we now have. Cleaning was a constant job. On and on and on.

Finally he interrupted and said, "Well, at least the kids were probably bored."

Again, what?

As I began on another diatribe about how much was required of children and at such an early age, he quickly stood, stated his finger was better and ran outside to play. I guess I made my point. He probably saw the inevitable direction of my lecture, which would lead to more work for him. He knows me well. Hint at boredom in our house and you are given a chore to fill your time.

At least I set this one child straight. But it sure got me to thinking. So often we complain about the state of things today. We spend a ridiculous amount of money on conveniences and then complain about our lack of time and money. Frankly, in reviewing the difficult life our ancestors had, I really don't long to live in a different time. Politically, yes. Religiously, you bet. But in regards to the advances of science, medicine, and technology I'm quite happy to be living in this era. Aren't you?

And you can bet that the next time I'm complaining in my heart about doing the dishes, I'll remember this little chat with my son and thank God for His goodness in providing running water, a dishwasher, and so many other things. I really do have NOTHING to complain about.

A Cup of Patience and a Dash of Grace

I began homeschooling three years ago with grandiose visions of teaching my children all they would need to know about practical things like cooking, cleaning, laundry, and repairs. And of course they would also be advanced in all subjects, speaking several languages, and reading a book a week.

Okay, okay. Maybe my dreams weren't really quite that big, but I definitely expected to fit more in than real life normally allows.

One of those dreams was to teach my children how to cook. I figured that since my kids would be home all day, I'd just give each one a week of the month and they would cook for that whole week with me.

But I forgot something.

I don't like to cook with kids. Ever.

I'm not one of those moms that overlooks sticky floors, messy counters, licked spoons dropped back into the batter, and inedible results after hours in the kitchen. I typically find cooking with my children to be exhausting, frustrating, and an overall headache-producing endeavor.

This year, however, I am braving the kitchen with ONE of my children. I have decided that 5th grade will include a unit on cooking. Whichever season does not include a sport for the 5th grader will be the time they tackle this intensive unit. For David, my current 5th grader, that means now.

We started two days ago. And amazingly, it's going really well! There's something to say for a child who can use a knife without supervision, listen to instruction and actually do what they're told, read a recipe, keep the mess to a minimum, and have the good sense not to burn themself on the stove.

So far we've made stir fry and potato soup. On the menu for later this week are beef stew, chicken and rice casserole, spaghetti and other yummy meals.

I love that I am enjoying cooking with my son. It reminds me of when Josh and I first married and would cook a meal together - except that David doesn't use every single pot in the kitchen.

My goal is to have David cook an entire week of meals on his own by the end of this unit. Meaning that he'll have to plan the menu, make the shopping list, shop with me and pay at the register, and then cook all the meals.

He swears he'll never get married, so I have convinced him of the importance of this by appealing to his stomach. I mean, really, what man wants to eat microwave meals every night when he finally leaves the nest?

So, here I go! Wish me luck. And pray that I have patience in the kitchen for the next three months. Because after this kid, I have four more to go.

Jesse's Birth Part III

I have been asked to write Jesse's birth story. I'm glad to do so in the hopes that it encourages other women out there to think outside the box a bit when it comes to pregnancy and labor and children.

Jesse's Birth Part 1
Jesse's Birth Part II


{Warning: this blog entry shares candidly about the birth process. Don't read it if that makes you nervous.}



My water broke at 12:30am on Jesse's due date. (I've delivered three of my five babies on their due dates! Isn't that odd?!) I tried to get some sleep knowing that I had a marathon ahead of me. But really, who can sleep well when they know their baby is on the way? An hour later my contractions started. I had been having contractions for WEEKS. Sometimes they were really intense. I can't say these were any worse than what I'd already experienced in pre-labor, but at least I knew they were for real. Around 8am the contractions had gotten to about 8 minutes apart and were lasting close to a minute. I called our midwife, Leah, knowing she had a 45 minute drive and that the tub would arrive with her. We then sent the kids over to my parents house so they wouldn't be traumatized by the experience. After all, we want to have grandchildren some day!

At 9am Leah and her two assistants arrived at our doorstep. They set up the tub and made sure everything was ready for the birth. At which time, my contractions completely stopped. Josh and I tried so many things to get them going again, but we just couldn't seem to get regular, hard contractions to surface. We walked around the block (several times), I trudged my heavy body up and down flights of stairs again and again. I tried resting. I tried rocking. I tried the birthing ball. I ate lunch. Nothing was working.

Around 2pm, we were frustrated and also somewhat concerned since my water had broken 14 hours before. I really had no desire to go to the hospital, but knew that if this continued for a full 24 hours, a hospital birth was likely going to be our only option. While walking the block, Leah had given me some herbs to try. First, she gave me blue cohosh. It was just 3 tiny pills that I dissolved under my tongue. We tried a couple rounds of that, but it didn't advance labor. But THEN, she suggested we try two other things. First, she gave me some black cohosh pills and she instructed Josh to try some nipple stimulation. I don't know if it was one or the other or both, but something sure worked. Within just a few minutes (literally about 10 minutes!) I was in transition. I went from zero contractions to "this baby is coming NOW" contractions. (Which I am so thankful for, because there was talk of me drinking some castor oil. Blech!)

Since the tub was already set up and ready in our room, Josh headed downstairs to get Leah and we promplty got me into the tub. The warm water felt heavenly - for about a minute before my contractions began again. It seemed I could barely catch my breath between them, but then again, that's how it's supposed to be. I tried several positions: sitting, squatting, hands and knees. I was most comfortable squatting near the edge of the tub holding onto Leah's arms as she steadied me so I could lean back. But with each contraction the most important thing was for Josh's hand to be pressing on my back. I've had back labor twice before and got to experience it once again with Jesse.

I can say that although I pushed for longer than I typically do, everything felt more natural. I wasn't flat on my back with people holding up my legs, yelling at me to push. Instead, I had the midwives gently encouraging me, telling me that I was doing things just right. When the pain was overwhelming, they assured me that the end was in sight and that I would be able to get through it. Josh was lovingly providing counterpressure for my back and no one fussed when I wanted to move about. Thankfully, Josh thought to close the bedroom windows so our neighbors wouldn't freak out when they heard my loud moans and groans. (I've heard of people having silent births, but I just don't know how you do that when you're going without meds!)

At the very end, I got onto my hands and knees in the tub. My legs were cramping from squatting and I needed a new position. I could tell that Jesse was ready to arrive, so I pushed continuously - even after the contraction ended. There really wasn't any time between pushing out his head and the rest of him. He just came all at once! Josh was able to help catch him and I was able to hold him immediately. He didn't cry immediately, but there was no fear. His color was good and he was not tangled in the cord. I think the water birth was actually easier on him. He came out very relaxed! Once I had held Jesse for a couple of minutes, the midwives and Josh helped me (while I was still holding slippery little Jesse) out of the tub and onto the bed. I was able to nurse him immediately as they helped Josh cut the cord and I delivered the placenta. I had no tearing and much less bleeding than normal.

Josh then took Jesse and washed him off. The midwives checked him over thoroughly. They cleaned the room, gave us care instructions and helped get some food and drink into me. And then they were gone. The kids came over with Nana and Grandpa just 3 hours after Jesse was born. You couldn't tell that I had just given birth in that room!

And once everyone left, Josh and I were able to care for our sweet little one on our own. No nurses coming and going throughout the night, no loud beeping machines, no bright lights. Just a quiet household where two parents were getting to know their newest child.

I have to say that without a husband willing to really be there for his wife, a homebirth wouldn't be a wonderful thing. Josh was incredible during that first week. (He's incredible all the time, but I was amazed with his patience and care after Jesse's birth.) He set up a cot in our room so that he was right there if I needed him and so that Jesse and I could share the bed. For the first 24 hours, he was required to be at my side any time I needed to get out of bed. He changed the icky meconium diapers and brought me food and drink any time I was hungry or thirsty. He did the laundry, washed the dishes, kept the house clean, fielded phone calls and visitors and never once complained. Without him at my side, I wouldn't have considered this birth a success.

Our sweet boy was born at 4:14pm. He was healthy, alert and quiet. Would I say that 16 hours of labor was worth it? You bet! How about laboring with no meds? Absolutely. It was difficult, but in retrospect, I can most definitely say that this has been the most positive birth experience for me. I've had an epidural, I've labored for more than 24 hours, I've had back labor, labor with no meds, an emergency C-section, a VBAC and now a home birth. Out of all of those, this was hands down the best.

And look at the sweet little man I now have to show for it!

James 1:17 Every good gift and every perfect gift is from above, coming down from the Father of lights with whom there is no variation or shadow due to change.