Large Family Car Travel Tips: Keeping the Car Organized

Often when I research things about large families, I come up with tips for families that have only 2-4 children. We are a family of 8 (soon). These travel posts are to help bigger families figure out how to survive days of road travel with minimal tension, whining, and stress. Hope it helps, and happy travels!


Other travel posts in this series:
Special Tips You May Not Know
Suitcase Organization
Snacks
Keeping Kids Occupied

Trash cans
You'll want to have trash cans within reach of everyone. With younger children this will minimize the mess of passing items forward or back in the van. It also keeps mom and dad from being needed constantly whenever food is being consumed - which in turn allows you to focus on driving. And it helps the kids take responsibility for the vehicle's cleanliness. We used square utility totes from Thirty One lined with plastic bags, but even just a small trash can would do.

Utilize under the seat storage!
With a big family, you need every spare inch of space! Don't forget about the storage under seats. Even if your seats are low to the floor, you can still find small things that will fit underneath. If your van is like ours, you can fit larger items underneath your seats. This is a great area to store things you won't need to access frequently but still need for the trip. And underneath the front passenger seat is a perfect place to put that first aid kit that you'll invariably need.

Pack music you can all stand
This is sooo important! With younger kids it's easy to pack a bunch of toddler songs. Trust me, you'll go crazy if that's all you listen to for days on end! Likewise, if your teens like a certain genre of music that just grates on your nerves, either get the teen an ipod, or find a compromise by listening to some of their music and some of yours. One of the great things about vehicles these days is that you can set the music to play mostly in the front or back of the car.

For those without ipods, remember that a smart phone can also store music and typically will have a headphone jack. This can allow parents to listen to their own stuff on the phone while having kid music on in the car. And if you want some great kid music that most parents can stand check out Go Fish. Their harmonies are terrific and the music is fun.

Bin for cords
I can't take credit for thinking this one up, but it's a lifesaver. Grab a shoebox sized plastic bin at the dollar store and use it to keep all cords for electronics contained in one place. It's easy to grab as you head into a hotel for the night, and it allows you to find the cord you need quickly and easily.

Label suitcases



We tried this on our recent trip and it was incredibly useful! Before packing I laminated index cards that had days listed on them. I then used ribbon to tie these onto the suitcases so we knew which bags were needed for which nights. It made unpacking the car each night so much easier and massively decreased my husband's frustration at having to bring in unnecessary suitcases.

Keep food organized and dole out snacks by day instead of prepping all before the trip



I'll be honest, this sounds great. But if you're on the road for a long time, it's a little harder to stay motivated. But for our first week, we did really well with this. We brought lots of fruit, veggies, and snacks with us. But instead of peeling all oranges before leaving the house, we just peeled them on the day we planned to eat them. Once peeled, we put them in their own container and then doled them out as needed in the car. Same with the grapes, apples, cheese sticks, goldfish, etc. We had a large bin full of snack items, a bin with bread and other lunch items, one with paper goods and a few knives, and a large cooler filled with drinks and refrigerated items. Instead of trying to access each bin in the middle of a drive, we just prepped things before leaving in the morning and then were set for the day.

Try to keep like items together - clothes, activities, snacks. Certain things must be in reach of the parents, others can hang out in the back
Suitcases just aren't needed while driving. Neither are swim gear, cots, sleeping bags, etc. However, you will need to access toys, activities, food items, trash recepticles, etc. Make sure your throw up bucket is also accessible! Doing whatever you can to have necessary items within reach will greatly decrease the amount of stops you have to make and the frustration level of mom and dad.

Use a grabber to get things to kids in the back



If you have a van, chances are you can't always reach your children. When handing out food, toys, tissues, etc., it's very helpful to have a grabber. These can often be found at toy shops and novelty stores. We've had ours for years and still love it!

Large Family Car Travel Tips: Special Tips You May Not Know

Often when I research things for large families, I come across tips for families that have only 2-4 children. We are a family of 8 (soon). These travel posts are to help bigger families figure out how to survive days of road travel with minimal tension, whining, and stress. Hope it helps, and happy travels!

Other travel posts in this series:
Keeping the Car Organized
Suitcase Organization
Snacks
Keeping Kids Occupied




Expect the unexpected!
From switching hotels because of filth, to driving extra hours in a day, to massive sightseeing plans obliterated by a snowstorm ... you have to be ready to roll with the punches when traveling as a family. We've had so much go wrong over our years of roadtrips, but most of it has created fun and lasting memories. We've had a few ER visits, a cartop carrier fly off the van on the highway, detours that lasted hours, traffic jams, horrible illness, car troubles that had us walking a mile with a baby to the nearest hotel in the middle of the night, and much, much more. When you are able to look at the situation calmly you'll make better decisions and be able to lead your family in a much more gentle way. No trip will go exactly as planned or hoped, so expect to have a few bumps on the road and pray that you can laugh at it in the days to come.

Plan kid activities in chunks
We've found that giving kids chunks of time to do things makes the day go faster. For two hours, have them play with the stuff in their backpacks. Then get out a snack and an activity that will last an hour or so. Next stop for lunch. After that, a movie can take up the next two hours while any babies nap. Continue the day in this way, and you'll find the kids are happier. Not only does it remind you to keep food in their bellies, but it also forces you to stop every few hours to get out new activities. Breaks for stretching and bathroom visits will keep the whole family in a better mood.

Drink those fluids!
Don't allow yourself to become dehydrated so you can avoid bathroom breaks. Your body needs the fluid to keep you going - especially lots of water! Water will even help with those swollen hands and feet that come from salty take out food and long hours of sitting. Bathroom breaks don't have to be long, but they need to happen. Plus, a little fresh air and stretching will help your brain stay alert as you drive.

Laundry in hotels
Personally I haven't had to take advantage of this service. But it's good to know about just in case. When in a pinch, many hotels will allow their guests to use the laundry services for a fee. The fee and policies will vary by hotel, but if you've had a child get sick in the car, this is a great option to avoid a late-night run to the laundromat.

Check food policies
Did you know that some hotels don't offer a complimentary breakfast? And some will include a complimentary dinner with your stay! We love staying at the Drury Inn. Not only do they give you a hot breakfast each morning, but they also have a dinner option in the evening. The hotel puts out hot foods - simple fare such has hot dogs, nachos, baked potatoes - and you can feed your family for FREE! (Well, it's really in the hotel cost, but it feels free.) They also have a complimentary drink for each adult and beverages for all hotel guests. And popcorn. Not to mention that we've always found the Drury to have excellent service and cleanliness.

AAA and hotel points
Perhaps you don't have AAA. I would argue that it's worth getting even just for one long road trip. Why? Most hotels and sightseeing places will offer a discount for AAA members. You can also request trip tickets from AAA to help you plan your journey. These are brochures that tell all about the areas you hope to visit. Lastly, God forbid you get stranded on the road! But if you do, AAA will pay for itself by coming to the rescue. We arrived in one city and had no clue what to do. We stopped by the local AAA office and received a bag full of ideas. Sooo helpful!

In regards to the hotel points ... some hotel chains offer credit cards that allow you to book within their company and earn points toward a free hotel stay. We got the Choice Hotels card for our recent trip and looked online to find which hotels in each location were within that company. For the most part we were very happy with the hotels, and the one time we weren't we received a full refund after canceling our reservation. The card also helped us to find some great deals online for hotels in this chain - a must for a family as big as ours which requires two rooms each night.
And after 5-6 nights, we earned a free stay at our next hotel. Totally worth it!

Stop!
Kids just don't handle trips the way adults do. Adults can push through for hours on end in the car. For us, it's easy to rationalize fewer stops by getting to the end goal faster. For kids, it's different. They aren't watching the miles tick by. They are agonizing as the minutes seem to pass slower and slower! Letting them out to run and stretch every couple of hours will actually HELP your travel. When our kids get tired of being in the car, they begin making up reasons to stop: I don't feel well, I need to go potty, my legs are cramping. In the end, we have found that stopping at regular intervals allows us to reach our destination more quickly than if we just power through and end up with lots of made-up excuses toward the end of the trip.

Check the toll road rules.
If driving through Illinois, get an IPass. Otherwise, it'll cost you double if you pay cash at each tollway. The Ipass also works in states that use the EZPass - which seems to be used most in the Midwest and East Coast.

Army cots and sleeping bags
Having a couple of army cots is not only helpful for guests at home and camping in summer, but are also great in hotel rooms. They cost little, take up little space in the car (can usually fit under seats), only require a sleeping bag and pillow, and work beautifully in hotel rooms. If kids tend to argue about bedspace when sharing a bed, these are a life saver! Or if you have a large family like ours. :)

Remember to keep social security numbers on hand
There is a chance you'll run into medical issues while traveling. During our most recent trip, our littlest had a run in with a rusty nail. Because I didn't have his social security number on hand, I was unable to access his records online to see if he needed a tetanus shot. Our doctor's office was closed and it was a huge hassle to figure out whether or not we needed to visit an urgent care facility. Just remember to NOT put names with the numbers. We keep ours written on a small piece of paper in a special spot and have a code to remember which number belongs to which child. Just be careful! If those numbers are ever found and matched with names, it could spell big trouble for you!

People are Watching ...

We have received many varied reactions to our family over the years. Some people smile and say how blessed we are to have so many children. Others look at us with horror and give a litany of excuses of why they wouldn't dare have more than one or two kids. We're used to it and it rarely fazes us anymore. But this trip and specifically the reactions we have received in California have surprised us.

A lot of people have been quite negative in their comments to us. One woman boldly ordered that I had better not be working outside the home. I agree, but not for the reasons she apparently thought important. To her it was the work load of having this many kids that was daunting. For me it's the eternally significant task of being around to teach and train them.

We have had people stare open-mouthed and even point at us as we unloaded from the van at rest stops and parks. Many, many people have asked about my pregnancy and the sex of this baby - only to express extreme disappointment and condolences because we're having another boy. We're not disappointed and we'd prefer congratulations. This is another precious life given to us.

The most shocking rudeness came as we waited for the elevator in a hotel. An elderly lady was also waiting to use the elevator. When she saw us, she blatantly informed us that she'd rather not ride on the elevator with us. No one else was waiting, it was just our family and her, and the elevator could have easily held twice that many people. Josh and I bit back a few choice words and agreed to wait while she took the elevator alone to her floor. (And this was after she had already yelled at David who kindly helped her push the button when she couldn't get it to light up.) We then tried to explain to our bewildered children what had just happened. Frankly, I don't think we understand it!

But in with the bad, there has also been some good. Many couples have stopped to count as we file past. Sometimes, they get a big grin and tell us how wonderfully blessed we are. We always smile, heartily agree, and thank them. We have received several comments on the good behavior and helpfulness of our children. That always makes our hearts glow! And we received one comment that really caused us to stop and think.

We were eating dinner in a buffet-style restaurant. We had all gotten our food and were enjoying the meal when a family walked by on their way out. The husband and wife stopped next to where Josh and I sat and said, "Your kids are so well behaved! You must be religious."

It took us a few moments to recover from that statement. No stranger has ever made the jump from good kids to faith-based training before. Josh thanked them and told them that he is a pastor and we enjoyed a nice conversation with them for several minutes. We didn't exchange names or much information, but their comment has stuck with me and caused me to think about the reactions our family receives and how we ought to respond.

There are three things that come to mind as I reflect on the varied comments our family receives:

1. People really are watching. It may seem that you move in obscurity. It may seem that nobody is noticing you. But even strangers see you. Whether out of curiosity or boredom, self-pride or admiration, people do watch and make judgments. Many of those people-watchers are willing to share their opinions of you as well - solicited or not. Be sure that you are acting in a way that reflects well on who you are because opinions are made in the space of seconds.

2. Those who don't want to listen, won't. We recently had a conversation with someone who specifically asked where we are from. We informed her that we had driven from Wisconsin. In the next sentence, she instead identified us as being from Utah. Even after being corrected a few times, she continued to talk of the "fact" that we hailed from Utah. Apparently a family this large must be Mormon! People who have made up their minds are often unwilling to listen. Just move on.

3. Given that people are watching and often ready to share opinions, be ready with your response. Sometimes you'll be thrown a curve-ball like we were as we waited for the elevator. But many comments are repeats. For those, your response is likely the only chance you'll get to reflect what you believe. As a Christian, my response either represents Christ well or has the power to do damage. Be gracious, be slow to judge, point to the One from whom all blessings flow. For us, most comments are directly related to family size. We expect people to say things like, "Wow! How do you survive with that many kids?" or "Don't you know what causes that?!" The latter is my personal favorite. Josh and I have started responding with a sly grin, a knowing nod, and a "Mmm hmmm". That usually shuts them up. But for questions that deserve an answer, we try to think carefully before responding. Sure, we have bad days with our kids and sometimes people catch us on those rough days. But we are still thankful for the opportunity to raise them, know them, and influence them. Our response to comments rude or kind should reflect our thankfulness - not our rough day.

1 Peter 3:15 But in your hearts set apart Christ as Lord. Always be prepared to give an answer to everyone who asks you to give the reason for the hope that you have. But do this with gentleness and respect.

Chains of Bondage

Today my sweet boy turns 7.

And yesterday I wondered for a few moments if he'd see the age of 7.

We were at a touristy store on the side of the highway in New Mexico, stretching our legs and using the bathrooms. My little man was in the bathroom by himself. I hovered nearby as the rest of the family looked at merchandise on the other side of the store.

I turned at a strange sound - it sounded like chains rattling. Sure enough it was! A convict in an orange jumpsuit, hands and feet bound by chains, followed by an armed guard was headed toward the men's room. Because the guard was a woman, she simply waited outside the bathroom door as this man headed into the bathroom where he would be alone with my son.

My heart did a few flips. In a brief moment, I considered several options. Run the length of the store and get Josh so he could join the two in the bathroom and protect his son? Tell the guard to get in there and make sure my little man was okay? Storm the restroom and forcibly remove my son? What to do?

Ultimately, I did nothing. I continued my quiet wait by the store shelves, trusting the only One who could actually protect my son from harm - God. A couple of minutes later, my son emerged unscathed from the restroom and I calmly ushered him to a quiet part of the store. When I asked if he had noticed the man in orange, he replied that he had. Thankfully he is so innocent that he had no idea of the reason for the man's chains and consequently no fear. He simply said, "I thought I heard chains, Mom. That's how I knew it wasn't Zack coming to get me."

A short time later, we returned to the van and continued on down the road. As I reflected on the scene inside the store, I felt the Holy Spirit gently nudge my heart.

Sin is sin. Really, in God's eyes, I was no better than that man. I could have been paraded around in an orange jumpsuit and chains, needing an armed guard to protect the public from my heinous acts. The only thing that has changed me from that person is the grace of God freely offered through Jesus Christ.

I began to quietly pray, thanking God for his saving work in my life.

And then it hit me. Who has prayed for this man?

Perhaps no one has ever cared enough to pray for his life. Perhaps no one has pleaded to God to do a remarkable and supernatural saving work in this man. THAT was something I could take action on! As the mile markers flew by on the side of the road, I spent the miles pleading for a man who only minutes ago had caused my heart to skip in fear.

And fear turned to peace and joy. Begging for my son's physical safety changed to pleading for a stranger's eternal life.

Looking past the physical chains to see the spiritual bondage was the only way for me to remember my own chains and the freedom I enjoy in Christ.

So today as I celebrate the life of my son, I will also continue to beg for the life of this man. For his life is as precious as my son's, and his crime is no different than mine.

Soul Comfort

We arrived home this afternoon from a wonderful week away. And while the vacation part was great, the odd schedule resulted in some whiny children. Our car ride home was quite an ordeal with a fussy baby who refused to nap or eat and who spent the latter part of the trip unhappily filling his diaper.

As soon as we got home I rushed him into the house and upstairs to change him. As he shivered and cried I talked gently to him trying to help him realize that we were HOME. I grabbed a blanket from his crib (we always turn the heat down when leaving for extended trips) and rocked him gently in our favorite chair. Almost immediately he calmed. He wrapped his chubby arms around me and laid his head on my shoulder. The whimpers and shivers ceased and his body relaxed.

We sat in the chair, rocking and cuddling, and I thought of what a difference the comfort of home can make. A specific chair, familiar sights, the safety of Mom's arms.

It brought to mind these verses from Psalm 27:4-5. One thing have I asked of the LORD, that will I seek after: that I may dwell in the house of the LORD all the days of my life, to gaze upon the beauty of the LORD and to inquire in his temple. For he will hide me in his shelter in the day of trouble; he will conceal me under the cover of his tent; he will lift me high upon a rock.

Doesn't this just give such a picture of comfort and joy? David's one desire was to be at home in the Lord's house. For him it provided shelter, safety, and encouragement. It was his familiar place.

Just as the familiarity of a favorite rocking chair and the four walls of our bedroom calmed my young son, time in the presence of the Lord ought to do the same for us. After a long, hard day moments spent in the Word will refresh and renew us. Quiet times of prayer will center our focus on the One who can calm our hearts and provide perspective. Placing ourselves in the lap of the Father wraps us in comfort and reminds us that we do not have to carry all the cares of this world. Someone else has offered to do that for us.

Jesus said, "Come to me, all you who are weary and burdened, and I will give you rest. Take my yoke upon you and learn from me, for I am gentle and humble in heart, and you will find rest for your souls. For my yoke is easy, and my burden is light." (Matthew 11:28-30)

Friend, lay down your burden. Give it up to the One who has offered to carry it. Rest, and take joy in His presence.